A
female
age
36-40,
*lleycat
writes:Hello Cupid, I am 22 year old Chinese. I was raised in Hong Kong and received my higher education in the UK. I lost my virginity to my current boyfriend in late January. I have been sexually active for three months now. I never had vaginal intercourse before I met my boyfriend, but my previous sexual history was rather unhealthy. My ex was a bit of a disappointment. I withheld sexual favour at the beginning, but later settled with giving blow job to him every single day. When the relationship deteriorated, I even agreed to shallow penetration of my anal. After the relationship fell apart, I developed a unreciprocated feeling towards my university tutor. I guess I was hopelessly attracted to him because he treated me with respect and kindness. I thought about him while I masturbated. I tried I couldn't abstain from the addiction no matter how hard I tried. I even masturbated for three times a day when I was depressed. I only came to my senses after I graduated and met my current boyfriend at my workplace. He is 10 years my senior, decent and virtuous. He doesn't enjoy rough sex and is very gentle unless I ask him to go harder. We have had sex for more than 15 times, but I can still feel a pain in my vagina. The virginity pain was the worse pain I have ever experienced. Although the pain started to abide after we had sex for a couple of times, it didn't fade entirely. I could still feel an irritating pain around the place where my hymen used to be. The pain was especially severe during fast and shallow penetration. I feel better during deep and hard penetration. I could never climax if the pain doesn't fade. I also suffer from a great discomfort after the intercourse, I feel like my vagina was stretched. The size of his penis is slightly above average. I suspect the pain is caused by the high freguency of masturbation. Apparently none of my acquaintances has expereinced similar problems.
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blow-job, depressed, hymen, lost my virginity, rough sex, sexual past, university, vagina, workplace Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2010): Perhaps you should pay a visit to your doctor or gynecologist. Don't be embarrassed to do so: they are used to all sorts of situations and questions, you know! At any rate, wouldn't it be worth it to find out what's going on and have sex be more comfortable for you?
One comment: glad to see you say "I finally came to my senses....." the other man you were dating doesn't sound as though that particular relationship was going to work out (sometimes - in fact, quite often - they don't, just because the two of you are just different and not well-suited) and I can certainly understand your falling for your university tutor because he treated you with respect and kindness.........but the good news is that you are now with a man you do like, and who likes you and treats you well! Never, ever, settle for anyone who does not show you respect and consideration, and whose company you don't enjoy!
Anyway, I encourage you to have a word with your doctor. Good luck to you!
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