A
female
age
30-35,
*here-there-is-light
writes:I am a sophomore student at a private preparatory school. My problem is that I have a teacher that i have recently become uncomfortable around. But I am afraid that the reasons I have aren't reason enough to talk to someone about.You see I am a very physically closed off person. I get very uncomfortable if anyone touches me unless I initiate contact first. My married teacher, on the other hand, seems to be the complete opposite. Almost every day he touches me at least once. Mostly he just comes up behind me during class or right after the bell rings and I'm putting my books away for the next class and he squeezes my shoulders a few times. I do flinch away but either he ignores it or does not notice. Even though I am not the only student he does this to, the others consist of students in sports with him, I am the only one who seems to think this behavior is strange. Not the other teachers nor the other students. No one is bothered by it but me! Recently the shoulder squeezes have turned into placing his arm around my shoulder or rubbing my arm when he said I looked sad. Or patting my back when he passes me in the hall. All these things no one comments on or cares about but they make me feel like a freak for letting it bother me when it obviously isn't intended as a non-platonic action. I would really like a second opinion as to whether or not I should talk to another teacher about it. Hopefully I'll just grow out of my shell and let it stop bothering me. Signed, A confused sophomore.
View related questions:
my teacher Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, where-there-is-light +, writes (3 May 2010):
where-there-is-light is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice! I think I can do that. I'm just a little shy and was unsure if this was something to talk to the teacher about. But I can see your point in this. I just hope that I can gather the strength to speak to him about this. It's just so mortifying to talk about. You know. Wish me luck.
~ where-there-is-light
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): Anything that makes you feel uncomfortable is NOT okay, no matter how anyone else reacts.
A lot of the girls at my college smack each other's bums and I'm NOT cool with it I've told them and now they leave me alone.
You need to tell the teacher that you know he doesn't mean anything by it but you would prefer if he didn't squeeze your shoulder etc.
I can't tell you wether he means anything by it or not but if you tell him you think he doesn't then he is unlikely to get offended and will leave you alone.
Wait behind at the end of class to talk to him and get a friend to wait outside the door for you. Just in case ;)
If it stays a problem then you need to get moved out of his classes. And don't listen to what anyone says - if YOU feel uncomfortable then its NOT okay.
We're all unique so we all feel differently about stuff.
Be strong girl!
...............................
|
