A
female
age
36-40,
*hygrl86
writes:my boyfriend and i have split up after 4 years, of being togeather. we are not just a dating couple, we lived togeather, raised his daughter togeather, bought cars togeather. everything was about us. he split up with me because he says he wasn't happy. i have always been good to him and so it was really hard to hear him say he was not happy. we have fought alot because he is a major flirt and he takes things to far with other girls sometimes although he has never cheated. he says he want to be friends and work on our communication, and go to counseling so we can have a future togeather (maybe). but he won't commit. I don't feel that it is right to go to counseling and work on communication if one day he may be with me working on our problems and the next day he could be sleeping with someone else. is this wrong of me to feel this way? i also feel that he is leading me on by telling me he loves me and misses me but he cant commit and he dosn't want to lead me on. but isn't him having communication with me at all mis leading? please help me! i feel lost and confused, i can't do this alone.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, itonlygetsbetter +, writes (4 November 2009):
I hear what you are saying and yes counselling does not work for everyone. Some people it goes in one ear and out the other, but it really doesn't hurt to try. And if he is making an effort to tell you he wants to go, there is definitely something still there but it needs some work. Give it a shot. No one says you have to do it forever try it for a few weeks and give it a chance. Trust is a huge part in a relationship without it there is none, it seems like you are saying he has been faithful to you so that is a good thing everyone has doubts sometimes but don't let that ruin your chances of working something out with him.
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