A
male
age
36-40,
*AINORFIRE
writes:Is love really worth fighting for. weve all seen it in the movies where the hero saves the planet defeats the bad guys and tattered and torn he gets the girl or the girl gets the guy.... roll credits.In the movies the hero faces impossible odds and survives things that kill normal people instantly or due to heart attacks from sheer fear. The romantic couple generally end up walking off together into the sunset. In the movie National Treasure with Nicholas Cage After survinvg impossible odds and multiple attempts on his life he is finally able to save his love intrest But in the sequel to the movie reality hits and the couple are divorcing and splitting.So in reality is love really worth fighting for does fighting for it make the bond stronger and last longer?Should the nerd have to fight all the jocks for the love of his life cant she just make things easier by making up her mind instead of forcing her pursuers into an epic conquest.
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (21 December 2011):
 As far as romance novels go it appears they NEVER fight for love.. at least never for the right reasons. They meet and end up happily ever after without knowing each other or without having anything to build a relationship on... Movies makes you think unrealistically either way.
I don't know what you mean by "fighting" for your love interest though. Nicolas Cage (don't remember that movie) probably fought to save someones LIFE, because they were in danger, rather than "fought to impress and win her over". Getting into a fight to impress someone is just stupid. Saving someones life is heroic and shows you care about other humans, in general.
Then when it comes to LOVE, unless the love is mutual then it's not really love, but more of an admiration and dedication to a person. It can be profound of course, and sincere, but it's unrequited love none the less. Unrequited love is not the kind of love you fight for. Mutual love with a partner who is also willing to fight and work things out, that's worth fighting for (as couples always have to do because life is rarely a cake-walk).
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2011): Life isn't like the movies but I guess you know that.
Some love is worth fighting for but only as long as you are aware that love on its own is never enough. You have to have a practical partnership that works. You have to be compatible. There have to be so many other conditions that have to be met for a relationship to work and love on its own never solved anything.
Love is used as an excuse for weakness by so many idiots it's not even funny. It's the reason people stay with abusers, stay in on/off relationships, agree to be fwb's when what they want is love, stay with cheaters, alcoholics, force their children to stay being abused, people kill their own children for love to spite their ex, they kill themselves because they can't live without their love, the list goes on and on.
Of course love can be a beautiful thing that sweeps you away but a common theme in romance movies is to have a guy who is completely unsuitable as a partner be changed by the love of the woman. What a lot of people don't realize is this is merely the function of a story, it's fantasy and character evolution and development are important aspects of telling a story but the reality is, that emotionally unstable, loner army veteran, who drinks in the same bar every night and gets into lots of fights is not relationship material just because his bronzed muscles glisten with sweat while he's chopping wood topless and that the idea of a person like him changing in real life is definitely not going to come from the love of a "good woman".
As long as people take into account the practicalities of being with a person then love will be beautiful thing. Sure you will encounter trouble but if you have the foundations of a loving partner, who is mentally stable, has a good quality of life and are not prepared to give up your moral principles and will not tolerate being lied to, used, cheated on or abused then you give yourself the best chance of happiness.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2011): From a female perspective, can't *he* just make things easier by being upfront if he likes her or not, instead of blowing hot and cold and plain confusing her? :)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2011): Forget films, they have to entertain, so the story line has to be dramatic. In real life love should grow out of friendship, sometimes though it can be quite instant - based on love, attraction, trust, fun, shared interests. You shouldn't have to fight for it. It should evolve naturally. That's the sort of love that lasts.
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