A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:OK, basically I'm 15, and crushing really hard on this actor I saw in a music video (he's the most gorgeous guy I ever saw, I'm not kidding). Only thing is, I just found out he was gay. I know, of course, I won't ever be able to hook up with this guy anyway, but I won't deny I'm kind of disappointed. Is it wrong to fantasize about making out with a gay guy even if I don't know him? If it is, how do I stop being attracted to one?Thanks.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2009): Totally nothing wrong. If he's an actor in a music video who you're never likely to meet, the fact that he's gay is of no relevance at all.
If you're attracted to gay guys that you know in real life, nothing wrong with that either. It lessens your chances of getting together with them, but nothing's ever certain. You can't force yourself to stop being attracted to them, and there's no harm at all in fantasising about them. (Gay guys have to live with fantasising all the time about men we can't have, since most guys are straight.)
Good luck!
A
female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (6 August 2009):
 Just because you admire a gay guy doesn't mean you're abnormal. It happened to me. You can't help who you have feelings for.
I would think about the qualities you want in a mate, and look for a straight guy with those qualities.
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