A
female
age
26-29,
*ings_alot_chicky
writes:Dear Cupid, My bf and i were together for 3 months and then he dumped me, he told me it was because he was afraid I was gonna dump him. We were broken up for 5 days and in those 5 days he had another girlfriend so now I don't trust him as much as I did before. Is it wrong for me not to trust him just because he had another girlfriend the five days we weren't together? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Abella +, writes (29 March 2011):
 he may have dumped you because he wanted to connect with the other girl.
And then he realised he likes you better.
It is trifle shallow and immature of him to veer off to connect with the other girl and then five days later he returned to you.
He probably was being too self centred to comprehend how much he would hurt you by doing all of the above. But he is still young, and he is still maturing. In another five years he will grow in maturity, and thus may or may not repeat this behavior again in the future.
We all occasionally choose to make thoughtless decisions. And as we mature we learn, and grow in wisdom those thoughtless people learn to develop some empathy..
It really comes down to whether you can truly forgive him, IF he convinces you that he has learned from his mistake. But if you choose to forgive him, but still have simmering resentment, such that you raise your discontent about this issue multiple times the future, then that is not the spirit of real forgiving.
Versus the possibility that you really cannot get past your hurt at his actions? If your disappointment in his actions is just so strong that you cannot get over the hurt, then perhaps you will leave him?
But the choice, of which option, really is up to you.
Ask yourself if you can forgive his hurtful actions? Permanently.
Regards, Abella
A
female
reader, sweetpie-x  +, writes (29 March 2011):
Well this depends on whether you are back together?If your not back together then what does it matter if you dont trust him, he doesn't need your trust!i have been in this situation. i was only with this guy 3 months, and we split up and then 3 days later he had another girlfriend, but then i have also done this, i was with a different guy for 2 years on and off he cheated on me plenty of times but i loved him so kept going back, and i just didnt have the guts to end it for good, then i met this guy who i fell head over heels for, even tho i was still with this other guy, and still loved him, you need to ask him before you start jumping to conclusions, these things happen, dont worry about them, your still young!! if something was going on between them then he isnt worth the time!! Hope this helps
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