A
female
age
36-40,
*higirl
writes:There is a cute guy at work. His shift starts as mine ends, but we usually end up talking for 5-15 minutes anyway. He could just be friendly, but Im interested in more. Should I ask him out?Reason I hesitate is that he is younger than me by 10 years and we kind of work together (different company and different schedules, but we do speak when my shift ends and his starts...). So, is it worth the risk of rejection? Or should I just enjoy the conversation and the view?
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male
reader, PuffinMuffin  +, writes (30 August 2016):
You won't get an answer unless you ask.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2016): I have to laugh out loud! Ain't it a bitch! Guys who like you will go out of their way to let you know. Even if you tried and failed. Don't forget, he'll keep trying!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (26 August 2016):
 Hehehe it's OK maybe you will learn something that can make asking him out easier.
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (26 August 2016):
chigirl is verified as being by the original poster of the question I chickened out! Crap. And now he has some days off + our shifts wont match up, so I wont see him for two weeks... Gonna try to find him on Facebook.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 August 2016):
Have you done a little sleuthing on FB? if you have his name? Might give you an idea if he is single or not without having to ask.
Or you can go the "easy" route and ask him if he wants to grab dinner/lunch when you both have a day off (if that happens).
If you ask in a casual manner it will put less pressure on him and if he declines it might not feel like a total rejection?
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (26 August 2016):
chigirl is verified as being by the original poster of the question*staying
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (26 August 2016):
chigirl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNo mentioning of a girlfriend, and I have asked about his sosial life. He offered his name first, and he had already asked about me from another coworker, so he already knew my name and education etc. We talk when our shifts match up, which is about 2-3 times a week. He lingers by my desk instead of just getting on with his work like the others do. Im usually the one who leave first because I dont like to stay too late after work. But I have ended up saying a bit after my shift ends, just talking to him.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 August 2016):
How long have you two been talking?
Have you "discussed" whether you are both single? IF you know his name, maybe do a little sleuthing? Has that ever been the talk of something (hobby or whatnot) that you could suggest you could go do, or a movie you talked about to go see?
I think it really depends on how I had gauged the situation.
I'd probably try and drop a few hints first, see if he catches on. (and yes I know some people don't get hints at all )
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2016): I really wish people would stop trying to do their dating on the job. It's where you work, not where you socialize.
You will put him on the spot, if he was only trying to be friendly. He'll have to figure out how to let you down easy. I hope he's not a jerk if he does.
Ask yourself this. Will it be awkward or will you be able to handle it if he says no? Will you immediately assume it's because of your age, and feel bad every-time you see him?
Besides, rejection isn't fatal. It's a moment of awkward embarrassment. You survive it. It's just a little bruise to the ego. Learn to spring-back. You can't always wait for the guy to make the first move.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (25 August 2016):
 If you like him I say go for it, you have nothing to lose, you both get on well, you are both adults therefore age is only a number. You have nothing to lose. Ask him would he like to meet for a coffee at the weekend, or some lunch and see how it goes, good luck!
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