A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I'm 28 and I've been working as a lawyer for about 4 years now. I don't really know why I went to law school but it seemed like the right thing to do, you know, get paid well, have a high status job and make my parents proud.My mum loves to be able to tell her friends that I'm a lawyer. In the beginning I didn't mind the work but lately, actually the past year and a half, I've come to the conclusion that I can't stand being a lawyer. The work is interesting sometimes but the pressures of it and the office environment are killing me. I basically hate it. I work in public practice now and it's gotten pretty bad. I've also worked in private law firms and the thought of working at one of those places again makes me sick. I guess that it doesn't help that I don't like my current boss either.So I started looking around and finally was offered a job at a university at which I will be using my skills as a lawyer, I will get paid more than I am currently making and I won't have the same pressures as in the law. I've accepted the job but my mum seems upset. She won't say what the problem is but I think it's the fact that I won't be a 'lawyer' anymore.I hate to disappoint her and now she's making me question my choice to leave the law and making me feel guilty.I am so confused and feel like I might be making a mistake. The thing is, deep down I don't like the law, but I like to make my mum happy and I too like to tell people that I'm a lawyer (yes, I can be snobby too). But is this worth staying in the field for if I'm not happy?How do I please my mum and make myself happy at the same time?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): At the end of the day you have to be true to yourself if you want to be truly happy. Don't stay stuck doing work you don't like, because no matter how financially rewarding and prestigious it may be, if there's no job satisfaction you're wasting your time. Life's too short for that. Follow your heart. The time you've spent in the law profession has by no means been in vain; as you quite rightly pointed out, you'll take the skills you've learnt with you and use them, even if you're not working as a lawyer specifically. Who knows, one day you may even want to return to the field. But I think you should do what's right for you here and now. Although they have the best intentions, parents can indirectly and inadvertently put you under a lot of pressure in such matters; it's perfectly understandable that you want to make your mum happy but after all, you're the one who has to get up every morning and go to work! If it helps, have a chat with your mum and explain how you feel - I'm sure she wouldn't want you to suffer in silence :) I hope everything works out for you. Good luck and take care!
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