A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok, so my everyone thinks my girlfriend is perfect. they all think she is smart,funny,nice and beautiful, the problem is i'm not so sure. i find a lot of the things she does annoying, i mean sometime i really think i like her, but other times im not so sure. one second i'll think i'm really attracted to her, other times i won't. she is so nice but she does a lot of weird things which can sometimes bother me and sometimes when i go to kiss her, her breath really stinks.i feel bad saying this because i know she really likes me but i just have a lot of doubts most of the time.so please can someone tell me if my thoughts are rational? and if i should continue seeing her if i feel this way? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2011): I've heard it said that nobody can know you as well as the person you're in a relationship with; that with your partner you reveal sides of yourself, both good and bad, which aren't apparent to anybody else. If that's true, then it's not surprising that others, looking in from the outside, can form conclusions about your boyfriend/girlfriend which you know not to be entirely accurate!
Your thoughts aren't irrational. If your intuition is telling you that something's amiss with your girlfriend, then don't ignore those feelings even though they aren't "nice". I think you should voice these doubts; strong relationships are built on a foundation of honesty, and as long as you're tactful and fair in addressing the things which are bothering you, then it oughtn't to cause offence. After all, if the positions were reversed you'd want to know if you were doing things which were upsetting your girlfriend, right? Don't suffer in silence!
Whilst others can offer opinions and guidance, only the two people involved in a relationship can truly know the score. If you discuss this with your girlfriend and there's no improvement in the situation, then perhaps for your sake you should consider calling it a day. Having a talk is certainly worth a try though - you never know, she may not have realised how her behaviour was affecting you and be willing to change. Good luck and take care :)
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