A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey it feels rather uncomfortable asking this, but i've no idea who else to talk to. I'll try to be brief but i'm sorry if it isn't.well i'm 16 and i'm a virgin, and i'm happy that way, i want to save it for someone special. but recently i've been having desires, i've been having dreams of being abused, treated really filthily by some mystery bloke, but loving it. kind of like the whole masochist fetish, but i've never been aroused by pain before, so why should i be now?am i wrong for enjoying these dreams? as i've said i've never had sex, i've never used toys or anything like that, so i've no idea how being 'filled' feels like, yet in the dream i can imagine it with such clarity i could swear that i know it will feel like what i imagined..i know it may sound really daft or childish but i really don't know if what i'm dreaming is healthy.naturally this is embarrassing to talk about for me, so i cannot talk to my mum about it, regardless of how close we are.thanks for any help.anon xx Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2011): believe it or not i had these kind of dreams from the age of 5yrs, i didnt know what sex was or even why i thought these, but i got turned on at the thought of being tied down and 'abused'
Fast forward 16yrs (im now 21yrs) i love bdsm and sexual torture, i guess my mind was telling me back then the future. bdsm is becoming alot more popular since people started talking about it, your not alone, dont worry. Yes they are fantasys but they dont have to be, if your into that later in life, when you get a partner, act out things with them, rollplay. Its your body, as long as your happy dony worry. research it online, maybe watch some bdsm videos. but if it is a phase, enjoy it :-)
good luck x
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (24 May 2011):
 It's just a fantasy. It is completely normal, and having a fantasy is no indication of what you would prefer in real life. Some fantasies you want to live, but in real life being mistreated, raped, abused, is not fun, and no one would enjoy that, naturally. But the "idea" of it is intriguing, forbidden, erotic. As long as you remember the difference between real life and fantasy, you can think and dream of anything you like. There is nothing weird or wrong about that.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2011): Don't worry, you are just beginning to discover your sexuality and having these dreams is perfectly normal! I'm 19 and this happened to me too, started when i was 16. I'm a virgin as well, but i don't really have these dreams anymore. Maybe it'll stop with you, maybe it won't, but there's definitely nothing wrong with you!
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (23 May 2011):
 Yeah it's a little out of the ordinary but who says ordinary is not weird?
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