A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: me and my boyfriend have been in a long distance relationship for almost a year. i don't know much about his personnal life. he doesn't do anything for me we only talk on the phone.he was supposed to take a job to make more money and so we could be closer but he turned it down. When he tells me he loves me i don't even feel it the same. Is it time to break up in move on? I love him but what do i do?
View related questions:
long distance, money, move on Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, charmed4eva353 +, writes (24 December 2006):
maybe you should take a break. im not saying it will be easy but maybe you should try and find someone who lives a lot nearer. long distant relation ships are always the hardest. Go out on a date and dont tell this man then if you are still thinking about him when on this date or feel that you cant do this because you feel guilty, then you no just how much you love him really. take care and merry christmas
A
female
reader, _flicky +, writes (24 December 2006):
You say you love him, but when he tells you he loves you, don't feel the same. It sounds to me like your affection for him has waned. Maybe the same thing has happened with him, and that's why he turned the job down. He could equally have turned it down so he has enough time to study.
If you want to keep a relationship with him enough, then you can. Can't you e-mail each other, or send each other letters? Photographs? Chatting over the internet? Little texts throughout the day? There are other ways to communicate with him rather than only talking over the phone. You don't know much about his personal life? Ask him about it! Visit him from time to time, even if it's only for a day or so.
Of course, if you go to all this effort it's only fair to expect him to do the same. He can't say he loves you and then make no effort to see you or talk to you, can he? Love isn't a one-way street.
Or maybe you will decide that a long-distance relationship doesn't cut it for you, and break it off. That would leave you free to find somebody you care about, and who you feel cares about you. It can be hard letting go, but sometimes it leads to better things.
What do you think will make you happiest? You should do what feels right to you. Maybe the question you should be asking yourself is: am I happy with my boyfriend? And if the answer is no, then it's time to break up and move on.
...............................
|