A
female
age
26-29,
*oveHimLoads
writes:hello everyone, well i know you probably get alot of questios about people being in love with teachers, but please answer mine because no one ever answers it. so here goes... right i am a young 13 year old girl and i have feelings for my teacher who is in his mid 40s. i have had these feelings for about 3 years now and every secoud of every day he is all i think about. This teacher knows i fancy him because everyone has told him at school even some of the teachers know. I can guess he knows i facy him as well because when ever he talks to me i go bright red and if hes watching me i always trip up or something? what causes this do you think? This teacher lets just call him Mr C is married and has a 9 month old baby. When we have asembally at school or even when im in his class he always stares at me and if i look up to look at him and hes looking at me (which he is alot of the time) our eyes just lock and neither of us can look away! Mr C tells me everythig about his life and i can tell him about mine. In design and techonolgy which he teaches we had to do some work on the computer and i got stuck so i asked him to come over and he put his arm over my body and just for ablut 3 minutes we wer so close i could feel his heart beating! In his lesson he also said to me 'your my own personal glamerous assistant' he said that in my ear. does he mean anything by that?? some of my friends said they think he has a crush on me !! what do you think?? we are together about 80% of the day, we spend so much time together! I am going into year 9 now so only 2 more years left at school. When i leave should i tell him how i feel about him? and should i ask for his email adress? sorry about all the questions guys please answer all of them. Thank You so much x
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male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (2 September 2011):
 Anything is possible but be careful, there are laws against messing around with a minor(he could get in very big trouble and you could be deeply hurt and ruined for life . Why not be the "adult in the room" and find someone your age? I see trouble ahead otherwise. As the song goes; ' I see far off winks of lightning"
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (2 September 2011):
 Sorry, as someone who is close in age to your teacher, I can tell you with a great deal of certainty that he sees you as a schoolgirl with a crush on him, and it probably doesn't cross his mind more than one minute in a day. He's probably had other girls have feelings for him in the past and I think that's one of the great problems male teachers face. So many leave the profession because they fall under suspicion of inappropriate conduct or they simply get tired of being cast as the love object in so many fantasies.
We get so many of these questions you should have a good look in the archives.
"Mr C tells me everythig about his life and i can tell him about mine." So has he told you how he met and fell in love with his wife, how they love and cherish each other and how it was to watch the woman he loves bring their baby into the world? I sincerely doubt you know much about his personal life, honestly. I think it's nice you feel you can confide in him but don't mistake the care and concern a teacher should have for a student as an indication that he has romantic feelings for you.
"In design and techonolgy which he teaches we had to do some work on the computer and i got stuck so i asked him to come over and he put his arm over my body and just for ablut 3 minutes we wer so close i could feel his heart beating! In his lesson he also said to me 'your my own personal glamerous assistant' he said that in my ear. does he mean anything by that??" If he means anything by that, he needs to be reported to the head of the school. Chances are though it was meant to be a compliment to make you feel good about yourself.
"some of my friends said they think he has a crush on me !! what do you think??" I really doubt it.
"we are together about 80% of the day, we spend so much time together! I am going into year 9 now so only 2 more years left at school. When i leave should i tell him how i feel about him?" No, don't do that, he'll have to report it and then they have to do an investigation and it'll look very bad for his career. He may lose his credentials and have to leave teaching. I think that's simply a very bad idea.
"and should i ask for his email adress?" Um, no. I think you need to look at this from a broader perspective. Maybe think about it from his wife's point of view, that might give you a different point of view to contemplate. I think it's hard for teenagers, and lots of adults for that matter, to see beyond the end of their own nose. I think it's just part of growing up and maturing, when you recognize that your feelings, while you feel them very deeply, aren't enough to wreck someone's career for and honestly are a one-sided crush that can and will never be reciprocated in the way you want.
All the adults here will tell you that they look back on themselves as teenagers and think, "what the HELL was I thinking when I as 14 or 15? I knew so little about the world!" There are some teenagers who will try to encourage you but that's generally because they have the same situation and have a crush on their own teachers themselves.
We've been there, we know what it was like, we also know what adults think like, and there really isn't any way that this teacher feels for you in the way you are hoping. Sorry.
If you are obsessing about this, I encourage you to talk to your parents about it or perhaps talk to another trusted adult who has your best interests at heart, so that you might get help if you need it. Maybe the counselor at school?
Anyway, good luck with your studies, and try to keep the fantasies, enjoyable and rich though they are, from taking over your reality, okay?
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