A
male
age
51-59,
*dpet23
writes:Is it possible for a woman to fall in love after spending only 3 intimate weekends together? We are both divorced and single. We both have kids that are grown and on their own, so in that aspect there is no problem. Even if they were small or "young" it would not be an issue. We get along pretty good , both emotionaly and sexualy. We are open with each other and so forth. Now we have been intimate only 3 times, we both agreed that we will be intimate and fill eachothers need but remain only friends! She lives in Philadelphia, I in NYC. Her reason was that distance would make any relationship other than friends impossible. I agreed, heck "no strings" dream come true? I do like her very much. Not only sex but as a good friend to, I can talk to her openly. Last Sunday she hugged me and said in a soft and loving voice " I think I'm falling for you honey" i don't know what to think or do. I mentioned it to her and her answer was " Let's see where this goes" Now she's toying with me. Can I be only someone to call whenever? I did write a few romantic poems after our 2nd weekend together, I did it to make her feel wanted because I want he. Am I partially resposible if she is developing something towards me? Now she calls me during the day at work and at night we she told me to get Skype. Now we have video calls. What should I do? If she wants a real relationship then I'll go for it. If we leave the no strings thing then fine to. We cant have it both ways.
View related questions:
at work, divorce Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (5 November 2009):
I think what she means by "falling for you" is that to begin with she was trying to think rationally and come to the realization that it is what it is: it's long distance and may not work out, so it's best to keep it friendly. Well it looks like she's starting to to like you more than what she was trying to make it out to be, she probably felt comfortable around you and knew that you probably liked her as well, so she went ahead and told you that she was falling for you. I don't think it's love, but probably infatuation or an interest in you. I think you should just keep it semi-casual for now and just go with the flow and see where it leads, no pressure.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2009): To answer your first question of can someone fall in love after only 3 weekends together...It is very easy to mistake lust for love. I think at this point she lusts for you but love is someone thing that develops over an extended period of time. As for whether you are leading her on, it was clear from the beginning that you guys were going to have a friends with benefits relationship do to the distance so I would say that you are not leading her on. Wooing her to make her feel good is normal. As for whether she wants a real relationship with you, if this is something you really want, then the best thing to do is talk with her about it and let her know you are developing real feelings for her. Having been married before, I am sure you understand the importance of communication in a relationship. Good luck!
...............................
|
