A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Right I met a guy before christmas. We dated a few times, and then he let me down a couple of times when we arranged to meet. So I text and said I don't mind being let down once but two three times is not on, so let's leave it here. He didn't put up much of a fight and so all was well.As my feelings had not run too deep with him, we just remained friends, and began talking every day on msn. I talked about dates I was going on and he talked about dates he was going on.Then the other evening we were just chatting, and out of the blue, he said, I've had to keep my distance from you. I said why on earth!! He said because you scare me, I said why ??? He then told me how he just knew he would fall for me if he kept seeing me, and how if he was in the right place he would give it all to me.Then again today, he said how he would so fall for me and I was so lovely, but after his failed marriage, he is scared of hurt and commitment. Well I now have become attached to him but I also have a level head so I have decided to stay off line for a month and not contatct him. I think he knows I'm there and has not had time to be without me to see if he actually misses me. So I'm off dating and keeping away.My sensible head says what rubbish if he thought that much of me he would just go for it. And the other part of me says, he had no reason to say those things, it was not like he needed to finish with me it was not like that hadn't already happend. So guys am I doing the right thing?? I think if I keep popping up as a friend I'm his security blanket.And guys out there, is it possible for a guy to actually to be scared to fall for someone??
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, AlextheOdd  +, writes (25 February 2009):
 Well either you can try to build a steady relationship with him, show him that their are commitments that work--eventually he will become more trusted in your relationship and who knows- it could lead to a family or marriage.
If you decide to move on, that is also fine. It is going to be hard hiding from him forever as you might always be stuck with that "what if i went back" question popping into your head but hey, it might be worth the headache. Just go out there and meet different guys, take your mind of him as much as you can. Maybe even one day go back just to check up on him and see how his life is without gloating about your own success in relationships. Goodluck!
-A
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