A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I can't get over the fact my boyfriend cheated on me , pure and simple. But I'm so worried about how people will view me leaving him when I took him back only a few months ago.So basically, my boyfriend slept with some random girl over the summer. He admitted it to me, and we tried to get past it because it was during a time when we were constantly fighting and we both wanted to try make things work. He proposed to me a couple of weeks afterwards but I said no because I was ready to forgive yet. He said he would ask again when the time was right.Things were ok for a while, we have been having sex and enjoying our relationship. But I can't get it out of my head that he did cheat, even if he didn't know the girl he still went with someone who he says meant nothing and hurt the women he claims he wants to marry someday. I've been thinking about it for a while, and I want to end it before either of us gets hurt anymore.I'm just worried about our friends and family, mainly because of two things. One, a lot of my friends warned me not to get back with him as soon as we did and I even stopped talking to some of them. And two, I work with his mum so it will be so awkward if things end badly.
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female
reader, Liz211  +, writes (22 May 2015):
Do not worry what other people think, this is about you and you alone. They don't have to live with the consequences of staying with him, you do. You owed to your self to see if you could get past it and make the relationship work. Now that you have nice on. Don't stay and be miserable, because while everybody is happy and living their life I'm sure they are not thinking about you the way you are thinking about them.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2014): Honestly your family will probably be relieved! Your heart isn't in the relationship anymore. You owe him nothing else, you gave another chance and it's not for you and he'll just have to accept it. Maybe it will teach him a valuable lesson, but you can't force yourself to stay.
Well done for acknowledging your feelings, you did a kind thing by giving him a chance when many would've thrown him out the door. Any relationship could end at any time regardless of whether someone cheats or they just fall out - good luck in your future, I'm sure your try for iends will be very supportive and understanding xx
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (3 December 2014):
 OF course it's ok to change your mind and end it.
and you don't owe anyone but him an explanation.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2014): Of course it is okay to change your mind.
You didn't know you were going to feel like this. Sometimes you have to try things again just to realize it isn't right for you. You needed closure to work out how you really felt. You cannot stay with someone because you feel you have to. It is YOUR life, not your friends on families and it is up to YOU to decide how you live it. If anybody judges you for your choices then that is their problem. The best thing to do is to end it before anybody else gets hurt. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2014): He cheated.
Don't lose sight of this fact. You are not responsible for his infidelity.
You loved him so much you tried to forgive him. Because you're a nice person.
But he broke your trust on such a fundamental level (for a fling not even someone he had feelings for!) that you cannot go back to the way things were. You've tried your best but the relationship is now sullied.
Walk away with your head held high for you have done nothing wrong. Contact all the friends you fell out with and apologise for not seeing clearly sooner. Thank them for being a voice of reason and tell them you appreciate having friends like them that you can trust to be honest with you.
His mother won't cause problems if she knows he cheated.
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A
male
reader, lifesgreat +, writes (3 December 2014):
well with his Mom ... I would not worry ... I mean I guess she knows that he cheated in the first place so she should know you haven't done any wrong.Also with regards to your friends .. yes you might feel silly but don't worry.. you know the saying ' partners come and go but friends are for life' so if you want to make up with them or the one you fell out with just say .. you wanted to give it ago because you loved him ( which tbf might be true anyway ) If they are good friends they will understand and the ones that come back are true friends anyway. so yeah .. you shouldn't feel bad .. you loved somebody and wanted to give it a try after they had hurt you bad but you realised you cant .. nothing wrong with that .You would only look silly if he did it again to you. And I know what where you are coming from if I had a ex cheat I would always see them as dirty /cheap and never see them in the same light.good look :) hey if you are quick you can save buying xmas presents !
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