A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I have been dating this guy for about four months now. He treats me well and he says he's in love with me. I've been happy with him, but lately I just don't have many of those feelings anymore. I recently realized that I have developed a crush on another guy, and I feel pretty bad about it because I can't really help it. Is it normal to develop crushes even when you're already in a relationship? Should I break up with my boyfriend to give the other guy a shot, or is this maybe just a phase that will pass over after a little while?
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female
reader, biscotti4 +, writes (2 February 2011):
I am 31 and only just now ready to settle down and date only 1 person. You are so young and should be free to follow your feelings. If you have feelings for someone else - go with them; see where they take you. 4 months is not very long; if you are already attracted to someone else - that says something - go with it and don't worry about being committed to just one person until you're a little bit older.
A
male
reader, The Realist +, writes (1 February 2011):
Yes it's complete normal and it happens to people all through out their lives. Even when your married people will catch your eye and you may wonder even for just a split second what life with someone else would be like.
The trouble comes down to whether the grass is greener on the other side or not. Is this new guy worth the risk or do you even want to stay with your bf anyway? Maybe you should give it some time and see how your feelings change.
In my relationship now I have seen people that I have wondered what it would be like to date them and every time I realize that it's not worth losing my gf at all. No one can offer what we have. That is what happens when you want to stay with the person.
Compitition in the dating world is a good thing it will strengthen the relationships that are meant to be and enable others to see that life is better with someone else.
Sorry I couldn't say which one to choose, you really have to follow your heart on that one.
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