A
male
age
51-59,
*uda43
writes:My wife of 15 years took a remark I made the wrong way. She got really upset and I said it did come out the wrong way. She is the only one I have been with in 15 years. The truth is the sex isn't like it used to be. I suggested having an escort join us and after some time my wife agreed. I know my wife would have never had done this and she did it for me. Is this something men who have been with 1 woman for years go through
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2010): If you are both looking to "spice up" your love life, that's great. Couples who've been together a long time will often go through this. But you should have an honest talk about it and do something you are both comfortable with. I'm sure you would do anything to make your wife happy as she would to make you happy. But neither of you should pressure the other into doing something they are not comfortable with.
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (17 June 2010):
 You shouldn't pressure her into it and generally it's best to allow her to a) pick the girl and b) let her set any ground rules she wants, like that you can't touch the other woman if that's what she wants. If you're planning on having the escort come and have both women pleasuring you in different ways, you should probably re-think that because I don't think it's likely your wife will be OK with that. If you're bringing this other woman in simply because you're bored of your wife after so long and want permission to cheat, you may want to think of other ways to add spice, like adding in toys, costumes, having sex in a semi-public place, etc... Think about it this way, how would you feel bringing in another man? It would certainly add something different. If that idea isn't almost as appealing you may want to rethink why you want to do this. A lot of people experience a period of this with their partner after awhile, but threesomes have a tendency of making someone very jealous and might break up the marriage.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2010): How would u have felt If she had suddenly brought up a male escort and said for him to join
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (17 June 2010):
 Maybe you should buy yourself a new car instead.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (17 June 2010):
 Adding an extra body to the marital bed is not what i would consider spicing up your sex life.. Quite the contrary. It's a sure way to start drama and problems.
Do I think it's normal? I think men ( and women) who have been married a long time want to recapture that early fire and passion. I just don't think paying a 3 person is going about it the right way. There are SO many other ways to spice up life & your sex-life, and YOU are old enough to know that.
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A
female
reader, tinkerbell**  +, writes (17 June 2010):
Its ok to spice things up in the bedroom just as long as you make sure that you now agree to sumthing she would like to do to spice things up. Talk to her and give her the oppurtunity to choose sumthing that she would like to do possibly a male escort this time round.
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