A
male
age
30-35,
*irch
writes: Hi everyone, I'd really appriciate the benifit of everyone's oppinions and experiances on this :) Appologies for the length.The problem started when I developed an unrequited love for a girl across the best part of three years and things didn't go well. Things between us have worked out ok now, and ironically we talk more then we ever used to largely because I've become a lot less tense around her. I've gradually come to the realisation that if she can't be happy with me then the next best thing is for her to be truely happy with someone else.I'm now at the point where I'm getting comfortable with the idea of dating other girls, but herein lies the problem: Is it fair for me to date knowing full well that the feelings that I have for them amount to little more then a crush, or finding them cute?It all seems so shallow compared to the feelings I once had and I don't want to persue a relationship where I hurt a partner by acting like its trivial. Dispite that, I'm still young and I want to have fun like everyone else my age, yet no one can compare to her. What should I do?
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female
reader, Amantha +, writes (3 March 2011):
You might think that no one can compare to you ex because you have a high standards of expectation. I was in the same situation before. The thing is no one is ever going to be the same you just have to let someone in a give them a chance. Just be nice talk to different girls and see how it goes. You never know someone can always change your mind and you can always like someone else better. You feel like this now because you haven't really let anyone in therefore no one has ever made you feel the way your ex did. And like you said your still young so there are many more girls you haven't met!
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