A
male
age
26-29,
*ordanheartbroke23
writes:I'm a 17 year old junior about to be a senior after the summer and me and my longtime girlfriend broke up I miss her of course but shes moved on and found somebody new but ever since I just feel lonely. I mean I have friends and all and sometimes we go out but not consistently. Plus I have work this summer so I'm not sure if I'll have a lot of time. But all I'm wonder is if it is bad that I don't get invited to parties or go out every week other than work? And I'm also worried about making friends in college.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2014): It depends what you want. I was partying a lot when I was very young, and I ended up having lots of casual sex which really didnt make me that happy. I had STDs three times, because I didn't wear condom being drunk.
Very soon I understood its not my scene. And at the age of 22 I stoped partying at all. It was not that much fun for me anymore. Now I am in my 30s , I still go to clubs twice a year, but only when someone invites me.
I think though that you are not talking that much about partying, but more about finding friends.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2014): Don't sweat it if you're not invited to a lot of parties.
It doesn't mean you're not cool. How many parties can 17 year-olds have anyway? Mostly birthday parties, if anything.
It's good that you're working for the summer. You won't be broke and counting on some small allowance from your parents. You're earning your own cash.
People who are really popular usually do a lot of partying; but they tend to go astray and end up in trouble.
It's nice to be popular, and always on the list; but sometimes having good friends you can count on is a lot better than being a big-time party-boy. If you went out, you'd be limited as to what you can do at your age. Most people your age just hangout. They can't get into clubs, and malls are full of aimless bored teenagers just walking around.
You can afford to take a girl to a movie, a nice dinner,and get tickets to concerts and shows.
It's almost useless telling someone your age he's better off as he is; because it always looks like everybody else is having all the fun. Maybe, but they are usually doing under-age drinking, getting into trouble with the law; or end up grounded by their parents.
It always looks better on the outside. I think you just miss your girlfriend and you're feeling a little depressed. That will fade in time. There are a lot of cute girls out there, just don't pass up opportunities to talk to them.
It's likely you'll meet girls even while you're working. You'll also run into your classmates and friends, and possibly get invited to parties. Summer has just started. Just stay busy and try to stay positive.
Think up ways you can have your own fun. Invite your best friend/s, and do a road-trip to a National Park or go camping. Check-out the local pool, water-slides, and amusement parks for the summer. Summer fairs and festivals.
Tons of girls!
You'll think of cool things to do. You just have to get used to being single again. You don't have to depend on other people to invite you out for a good-time. Just get out and find things to do. Go online, check the local news papers, or circulars. It's almost summer!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2014): No it's not bad, you're not even legally able to drink yet, OP. Not that it matters of course but you're only 17. I wasn't big into partying at that age, I preferred to hang out the odd time with friends watching movies or playing computer games.
These days you have almost constant access to people with the internet and phones, so it's even easier to just do nothing but still have have friends and socialise. One of ym sisters doesn't drink much, she doesn't go to clubs much and never really was bothered with that stuff, as long as she's happy then she can do what she likes.
My point is it's only bad if you actually want to be a party animal and it's making you sad. If you're okay with not doing those things right now and/or focussing on making some cash then there's nothing bad about it. Plus you're only 17, I'm mid-30's and still partying, so you have plenty of time to get into all that kind of stuff. Live your life at a pace that makes you happy. If you want to be a party boy then start getting to know people who do that at parties that you do go to.
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A
female
reader, Steenz +, writes (13 June 2014):
 There will always be times of loneliness but it will always subside. There is so much more to life than just partying, getting drunk, and doing what everyone else seems to be doing around you. You have so much to look forward to! Senior year! college! adventure! look at every opportunity with a positive view and take every bad situation with a grain of salt. There are experiences out there waiting to be fulfilled. You have to take the steps to creating your own happiness. Best of luck!
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