A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi Guys, I met this man back in September and we see each other every other weekend, as he lives 300 miles away. He calls me every night, sends 2 txts each day, morning and goodnight. He is very busy with work and he has a child (the child doesnt live with him)....or am i making excuses for him. I kind of feel let down every time i see him. I look forward to our weekends so much but it's always hit and miss.... friday evening turns into him showing up saturday evening etc. He hasnt let me down once but it just feels as though he isnt making that much of an effort.... on the other hand.... am i being high maintenance and impatient as i know he is quite busy. He always travels to see me (which is his choice) i have been to him a couple of times. He isnt very affectionate on the physical contact side and he seems quite scared when i make a move on him (that sounds awful!) It's always me that makes a move. I'm not sure that he is that 'into' me.... if that;s the case why does he call every night and break his neck to get to see me every other weekend.... he doesnt talk about feelings or anything and just shuts off when i try and discuss serious things.... i'm getting mixed signals... maybe i'm hormonal as i have this every few weeks its a really horrible feeling and the fact that he doesnt make a move on me makes me feel unattractive (and i know im not)... I don't want to dump him in case im reading all this wrong..... but i couldnt think of anything worse than him staying with me because he feels to bad to break it off..... and it isnt a booty call as he is very shy in that department... any advice please.
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male
reader, vegas  +, writes (2 February 2011):
300 miles - that's quite a haul . I believe there is something about you he finds attractive - or he wouldn't bother.Not beinfg interested physically is very unusual for a man . Not wanting to "talk" is normal for a man .
If he's not gay, I would try caressing him- and I believe you should see some fireworks-he may be afraid to make the first move.
A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (2 February 2011):
 I'm really quite puzzled by your post. You say he sends a text every morning and evening - except that sometimes instead of Friday night its Saturday morning (not sure if you are referring to receiving a text in that particular instance or a visit).
Besides which, HE makes the effort to come see you in person. You know for a fact that his work keeps him very busy. In my humble opinion, he's paying quite a lot of attention.
I want to caution you against trying to have talks about "serious things" - by which I suppose you mean relationship matters. You know, you only met him in September. It's rather soon to be getting that serious!
You do sound pretty high maintenance, you know!
As for the physical stuff and "making moves" perhaps you come on a bit too strong, maybe?
Anyway, men are not always comfortable discussing feelings. You'd be better off trying to relax and enjoy the time you spend together.....if its not enjoyable, perhaps you should end it.......before he does.
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