A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi guys! I'm confused so would love to know your take on the situation!I am currently doing a university course that involves volunteering for two weeks, 4 times a year at different charity's. At my most recent charity placement, me and one of the employees seemed to of hit it off. (Just like to clarify we are not coworkers or will never be coworkers. I finished there Friday and will never return.) There are 5 years ago gap between us just so you know!I firstly noticed him watching me all the time, and then when i would look at him he would quickly turn away. I noticed there was a lot of chemistry between us, but we didn't really talk that much in my first week. We both just kept catching one another watching each other.I developed a 'crush' you could say, and decided that I wanted to make an effort and maybe see this guy once my placement had ended. In my second week we started talking to each other, we spent a lot of time together flirting. I added him on Facebook and he accepted, and then he followed me on twitter.I spoke to him first via Facebook chat about something to do with work, and we spent all night talking. The following two days he spoke to me first about various things and we yet again spent all night chatting. Flirting in the form of teasing each other about silly things.Whilst on placement he accidentally through out one of my pieces of paperwork I needed and it became a joke! Later that evening he asked me if I had forgiven him and offered to make it up to me by taking me to one of the Christmas themed parks I had said i wanted to go to, I agreed to go but we didn't arrange anything, on my last day he did mention going again though in person, and said he wanted to make it up to me. He walked me to my car and said he would speak to me soon. About an hour later he sent me a picture of the cartoon character he nicknamed me. That was all we spoke that night though as he was going out.Since I have left he hasn't made contact with me first, I did speak to him first on Saturday and whilst after that we did speak all day, his reply's were two hours apart but he was out with his friends. Yesterday I purposely didn't talk to him and he made no attempt to speak to me either. Therefore we didn't speak at all.This morning I messaged him saying that I missed the charity, and he did reply an hour later.I'm just wondering if you guys think that he is interested but just keeping things cool as am i? I'm trying not to seem that interested but wonder if maybe he is doing the same. Or do you think that hes not really that bothered and was just being friendly? If so i don't understand why he started a conversation with me two days in a row and offered to take me out. I'm just confused and haven't dated in a while. This guy is everything I look for so will be a bit gutted if it turns out hes not interested. I don't want to just let the friendship end now I've left, but i also don't want to seem clingy!Thanks guys!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2014): Please please please don't build your hopes up too high when you haven't even had the first date! Stop using social media to measure a person's feelings for you. If it takes an hour to answer, he may be busy; and you don't want to look needy or too anxious.
No need to be insecure at this point. He has shown definite interest and is just spending time with his friends and going about his normal life. You should fill in the time-gaps with your own personal activities and keep things as casual as you can and not let yourself get too anxious for his attention.
If you're not his girlfriend and he's only warming up to you; what difference does it make how long it takes for an answer to your messages?
Lots of women have written DC taken in by guys who just love to message back and forth all day. That was all they had to offer. Then nothing happened. It tapered off and stopped altogether.
Your guy has made a date with you in person. He may not be into a lot of messaging. Some guys aren't. I'm not.
The proof of liking you is when he spends his time with you. Not date you by phone-message. If he happens to have an active life; he isn't spending the majority of his time on the phone. Leave a voice-mail message when he's missing in action; then forget about it!
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