A
female
age
41-50,
*isaJoy
writes:I’m utterly confused and would love your help. A man I’ve known for years has been texting me with cryptic messages. We live in different states. He asked me to visit him. I laughed it off. But he asked again and nowI know he’s serious. He teases with borderline flirty messages. How he’s under a blanket by the fire. He needs help and has to be creative. He said he will have a drink waiting for me. I showed a friend and she told me I’m reading into it and he just needed a friend to talk to and he’s probably high. She said if he doesn’t mention it again it was a mistake while high. It happened a couple weeks ago and now it happened again yesterday. Said he’s been thinking of me visiting and hopes it’s soon. Is he interested in sex? Companionship? What?
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female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (24 November 2018):
 ASK.
A
female
reader, LisaJoy +, writes (23 November 2018):
LisaJoy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for answering my question. He is single and I think what is complicating all of this is he has been a family friend for years. Our moms are best friends. His dad recently passed away and he was here for the funeral and we connected there after not seeing each other for a couple years. He has been writing me every day. Little things like Happy Thanksgiving with a kiss emoji. Just so out of character for the relationship we have always had which has been more like family. I'd love to flat out ask him what he's suggesting but I think it may embarrass him. He has brought up the blanket thing twice, he just needs the other half. I mean this sound blatantly obvious but he's not that direct in nature normally. I'm just stunned and confused.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (22 November 2018):
 Sounds like he is hoping for a roll in the hay.
IS this guy married, dating someone or single?
If he ISN'T single... I'd ignore his little "hints" or just simply shut him down. And I CERTAINLY wouldn't go visit him.
If he is single, the ask him straight up what he is hinting at because you can't read minds.
But BEFORE you do that, YOU have to decide IF you are looking for something casual because how likely is it that the two of you will be living in the same state and actually date? IF you are going to be realistic.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2018): Flat-out ask him! Nobody knows what he's up to; or what he's thinking, but he himself. Mind-games and kids-play is stupid.
If he is making suggestive comments like he's under a blanket; he's inviting you to get under the blanket with him.
If he can't man-up and ask for a date; don't even consider any suggestion of being friends with benefits. People who dither and dick around with you for years need to be ignored' and swiped to the left! They're wasting your time with dirty little comments and sexual-innuendo. So very adolescent!
Bring it up to adult-level and ask him straight-out what he's suggesting?
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