A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I have this friend who I'm really close with, but every now and then we hook up when we're really drunk, like REALLY drunk. and most of the time it's just me doing everything, and sometimes he even pushes me off, but i can't help myself so i keep going, and we have talked about this DURING, so i didn't rape him. I said "I feel bad this is happening again." and he said "It's ok, if i didn't want it i would have stopped you a long time ago." but he NEVER remembers in the morning, or at least wont admit to it...and just this last week i took it to the next level and he came for the first time with me.. or anyone for that matter, in my mouth of all places. but still he claims not to remember a thing.so is he lying? can you sleep through an orgasm like that? he was REALLY drunk remember, but always responsive to me.
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female
reader, howcomehoney  +, writes (9 December 2008):
 Sounds like he's in denial. Does he get drunk every time he sees you? If it's a regular occurence, he's probably doing it on purpose. After all, alcohol is an easy scapegoat... Maybe he really doesn't remember, maybe he doesn't want to remember. Is this happening more and more frequently or is it just a few once-offs?
When you talk to him about it sober and he says he doesn't remember, how does he react? Is he shocked? Does he say you're lying? Or does he say something like "Yeah, it could have happened, but I don't remember anything"? If it's the latter, he's probably just a drunkard. If it's the former, I would bet that he's having serious doubts about his sexuality.
He obviously isn't ready for anything at the moment so there's not much you can do.
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