A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My friend and I have been exclusively dating in a long distance relationship for the past four months. We've been close friends for the past 10 years. Since the drive is only two hours, we've been able to see each other most of the time every other weekend. The weekends are amazing, as expected. We talk via IM or phone every weeknight for 2-4 hours. The weekends I'm not there he's usually "busy" and I so I don't bother trying to call. The times I have I usually don't get a hold of him. I have yet to meet his friends or family. I figured he wasn't ready so I let it slide. After I had to ask, he recently told me he's been hanging out "as a friend" with his ex every couple of weeks and that he didn't bother telling me because I didn't ask. So that raised the red flag. Right after I asked what our plans were for New Year's. His reply: it's tradition that he spends it with his best friend and their family. He didn't even invite me along like other social gatherings/holidays. So do you think he's cheating, not invested in the relationship? I don't know if/how to confront him or if I should just end it. Help.
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (26 November 2010):
 There's not enough evidence pointing to him cheating. I would consider him hanging out with his ex even though they very well could be friends a red flag too. Yeah, it's something you're not going to randomly ask, but he could volunteer the information. I suppose he didn't because he may of thought it wasn't a big deal. 10 years being friends and you haven't met his friends or family? You think you would have already met them.
As far as New Year's Eve goes, I don't understand why can't he invite you too. Unless, you're unable to make it due to financial reasons, weather, or other obligations.
Now, this dating exclusively..you're basically in a relationship without the title, but you're obligated to each other correct? The communication and the travel seem great in this LDR. However, your trust in him is lacking. In a LDR you have to have trust..I know you often wonder if he is because you don't exactly know what he's doing but you have to trust that he's telling the truth.
I would ask if he would compromise on the New Year's Eve plans, seeing as you want to kiss him at 12..also point out in 10 years you have yet to meet his family and best friend. See what he says.
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