A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: A guy I work with is married and we are friends. I gave him the cold shoulder to adjust my self after an hurtful 'emotional affair', we did nothing wrong as he would stress to me. during a abreif make up session he said we are cut from the same cloth etc and stressed that he wants to be close to me and know me; I forgave the situation because he is significant to me in that he meeting him inspired a part of me that lye dead for a while. He knows this. Anyway, after the 'talk' at work, he started coming around to my work areas smiling, finding excuses to come into my department, though now I work with him again, he asked me for a coffee break, started buying me food, recently asked me to come out after work with the guys for a brew, and recently we spoke, he said that if anything happened to his relationship that he would find me. HE told me how great I was attractive talented yadda yadda, and that I should have kids to reporduce myself...etc...then added that in our situation there is a saying 'don't shit where you eat' (which I never have heard before), and he says that THAT woudn't apply to us because we have something different. The other day I noticed him get jealous and red when a male single co worker came up and gave me a huge playful hug. I told him that the guy told me he broke up with his girl. First he vaguley warned me about the guy, then stopped himself and said go ahead and date him if I wanted to. Later that night he told me he might be leaving for another job, my heart wrenched..but then later in the conversation said, he doubt he would actually go. My emotions did go thru a tizzy a bit. I guess, is he really being my friend or is this some kind of mind game keep it going tactic??? I know that if things heat up again... it likely could become more intense and more painful. I know he will not leave his wife, nor as i told him would I wish any ill will..I'm trying to gauge the scenerio while trying to get my lingering emotions in check. It seems he is really trying hard to be my friend, but I don't like the back and forth, I'm leaving then not stuff. Any ideas or am i over analyzing.?? Seems odd! Thanks
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affair, at work, broke up, co-worker, I work with, jealous Reply to this Question
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female
reader, pebble  +, writes (4 May 2009):
 He's not seeking your friendship. He's trying to get into your knickers.
You should listen to "eyes wide open" and think of the poor woman that is about to be made a fool out of if you go near this idiot.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (4 May 2009):
 I AM sharing something, my wisdom. This guy is definitely not looking to be a mere friend, all the signs are there. I also bring up the wife because if you do indulge yourself and do something you will regret with this guy, SHE is the innocent victim. I obviously hit a nerve with you so my work is done.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWHY DOES "eyes wide open" always slam writters and put emphasis on the wife, when the questions are about the person writting in for advice given their scenerio, obviously there is a wife involved. ??? Also, specifically as regarded my question, by which no physical intimacy was had with whom I wrote about. Why does "eyes wide open" insist that a married man cannot be seeking the friendship of a co worker without hwanting in their pants.??? Then metions think of his poor wife. Maybe wyes wide open would like to share something????
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (30 April 2009):
 This man is manipulating you and before you realise it you will be in full blown physical affair with him - because that is what he is working towards. He also sounds like he could be a bit of a control freak, so I would be very wary around him.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (30 April 2009):
Knock off this nonsense or you will truly regret it. Thinking of his poor wife should give you the incentive. He is not trying hard to be your friend, he's trying hard to get into your pants. Wise up chickie.
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