A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi I have a great relationship with my partner, but there is one huge thing we disagree on- dogs, and as time goes on, we realise we are both not budging on the subject!I have always had a dog since i was born, i was raised around many animals both of my parents are animal lovers and I have 2 cats currently. My last dog died last year,( he lived with my parents as my living situation could not accomodate him) and now i'm ready for another dog. i love dogs and my life feels deficient without them, i always said that when i owned my own home i would have plenty of dogs. but as my partner and i started to talk about the future we hit a brick wall with this.My partner does not agree on this and as time has gone on, i have begun to realise he is not joking when he says no way to dogs. I have tried to compromise and ask for one small dog, but he says no way. He says hes not scared of dogs, he just doesnt like them. i asked him why, and he said they are dirty, they make mess, they lick and can bite, they bark, theyre a tie, and they cause trouble so i can get it out of my mind.My point is- how would he know? he's never had one. He loves animals generally but has this thing about dogs, and i know where from- his mother has said exactly the same thing- she is a neat freak who believes dogs are dirty and make mess. She refused to care for any of our animals when we went on holiday, because of "the mess". he was never allowed pets when he was younger and i know this is where this attitude comes from. i don't want my children to grow up like this, suspicious and fearful of animals, and i think its important to have pets and to give a good home to them. i have had many years of companionship from my dogs and i feel that having a dog in the house makes me feel safe. I've tried to bring the subject up, but hes said " i said no- how many times!" It makes me very sad to think that i can never have a dog again- what can i do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2008): It says something about his character that he can be so hating of dogs, wether you want to believe it or not..and you can blame it on his mother's beliefs but that's a load of crap in my opinion because my mom hates all pets, and I completely love them. Are you sure he won't say no to kids in the future? Seems a lil' selfish to me.
A
male
reader, Uncle Sneaker +, writes (5 June 2008):
 There was a song "Love me, love my dog."
It's sad, but some people are like that. I have exactly the same problem. I love dogs. My wife doesn't.
And that's why my picture on here is of a cat. Sometimes you have to decide what's most important to you when your two loves are mutually exclusive - you can't have both.
I think it's probably easier for someone who loves dogs to live without one than it is for someone who hates dogs to live with one.
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A
male
reader, tommy2k7 +, writes (5 June 2008):
 Relationships are all about compromise, if you didnt do that they wouldnt work (if they did, they'd be very one-sided!) If this guy says he loves you a lot, he'd be willing to compromise, so, as in all compromises, it's time to talk - good luck!
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