A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been with a guy for 5 years and he is the love of my life. Everything was going great until I met his friend and instantly it was like I was drawn to this guy like a magnet. We would spend the night because there is no drinking and driving allowed and my boyfriend would pass out first and I would stay up just talking all night to his friend. We have so much in common and just have this connection that I've never encountered before. He challenges me and actually pays attention to me when I speak. Because of this I have been getting so mad at my boyfriend comparing him to his friend. I broke up with my boyfriend today because I felt like I needed some time to think about why I am having these intense feelings for someone else. However, I am aching so much and miss my boyfriend a lot. I have been waiting for these feelings to go away for his friend. They just won't. Have I made the wrong decision? I just can't help how i feel. And I know I don't want to really be with his friend it just was like a wake up call for me that I could have so many intense feelings for his friend. Please help, thank you.
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2013): You will meet few more people in your life that you will be infatuated with again and again.
Why you don't want to be with this new guy, if you like him so much? Did you notice something in him that would make it impossible to live with him?
This is why people commit. People don't want to constantly change partners. They pick one and stick to him. It calls commitment. First passion ALWAYS goes away, this is just how it works, people still stay with their partners. They meet like yourself somebody new and exciting, but they don't drop their partner because of that.
I think you need lots of things to figure out, what you want from life, and what kind of man you want.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2013): You're making no sense OP, you say you have a crazy intense feelings for his friend but don't want to be with him?
They can't exactly be as strong as you think at all if that's the case.
I think you made the right decision though. Your boyfriend deserves a woman who is sure she wants to be with him. You're not that woman. You call him the love of your life but you've dumped him because he got a crush on someone else and now you've dumped him because you realize what "you've been missing" then you need to stay single then OP.
It sounds like you've just come to the conclusion that you're just not ready to give up passion to be settled down.
Look you wanted time to figure things out, so take that time. You're not going to figure out this whole thing in day OP. So just take your time, consult with friends and see what you come up with. Maybe you love your ex but maybe you want to be free to explore others and go through that initial passionate stage of a relationship again.
Stop trying to force things and just take your time and think about all this.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2013): I think you're just attracted to his friend because of you guys have some similarity. But, remember that you only know him for just a short period time while you and your bf has been through 5 years relationship and I think you already know the real him.
I've been experienced the same relationship and I choose to stay with my bf. His friend flirt and ask me to hang out and dinner but I try to avoid his invitation as possible. We just communicating from bbm and email. But that already makes me feel guilty with my bf although he doesn't know it. After that, I told my bf to be more cautious with him.
Honestly, I feel the new sensation and happy when someone you think attractive to you flirt with you. But don't forget that feeling come because you feel bored and there's nothing new in your current relationship. Nothing to explore because you already know each other. I suggest you to spice up your relationship ond try to communicate what you think your boyfriend lack of compare to him. There impossible to keep break up with your bf because definitely there's always someone you think perfect or better than your bf in your life.
Hope this help. Gbu..:)
...............................
|
