A
female
age
41-50,
*unkin
writes:Dear Cupid,I am almost 31 years old and am in love with my ex husbands brother. We were both going through divorce at the same time. Comforted each other. And we fell in love. He is 20 years older than me. I do NOT care about age. My ex husband has moved on. Is very happy and living with a girlfriend. Very serious. Nothing between his brother and i had Ever happened until after. We don't know what drew us together. We dont know why we feel this way. And we have very different views on the situation. I say "love conquers all". And no one matters as long as you're happy. Life is too short to let others decide who you should be in love with. He says he can't do it anymore. He thought he could but he's struggling every day with the feeling of wonderful that we share when we are together and the whole "not morally right". I understand his side and he understands mine and said he wishes it was as easy as I make it seem. I know it doesnt happen everyday. Its pretty much taboo. But its a wonderful love and love story that we actually found. Am i the one that needs to wake up?? Or does he need to open his eyes and realize love is love and not to fight it?? We are hurting very bad trying to move on. Especially because neither of us want to.
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female
reader, punkin +, writes (2 September 2011):
punkin is verified as being by the original poster of the question@lovegirl--you are so right on many points. I am no longer pressuring. I have stepped back for a few weeks. We are still having a hard time dealing. He is completely worried about impacts on family and kids...as hes said how can he go from uncle to step dad. Its different but my children are young enough i think to just say oh...ok. idk. And his ex wife hasn't moved on with anyone else yet. She has moved far away from him and has ALOT of issues. I was never close with her at all. Barely even spoke. And it very well could be rebound...at this point i dont think so but i may be blinded.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2011): "...He says he can't do it anymore. He thought he could but he's struggling every day with the feeling of wonderful that we share when we are together and the whole "not morally right"...."
Why are u presurrising this man? He is suffering with guilt and he just cannot get over the fact that he is having sex with his sis in law. If feels that he has let himself down and he is worried about his reputation and his integrity.
What about his wife? And both your kids?
U may not want to admit this but too many peoples lives are going to be affected. How do u even face his ex wife? After all u both were Sis in law as well..
You both went from marriage to having a relationship. Rebound affair?
I see the merits in this man wanting to end it. However u are pushing him, too far and too soon. What are u afraid of? That he ends it? And THEN u will be alone.
Has his wife moved on? This man Is worried about reputational risk.
LoveGirl
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