A
male
age
51-59,
*tjerryv
writes:OK ~ Heres the scoop. Im a guy. I am married to a woman with very wealthy parents. Im not. My 80K an year is a drop in the bucket to them. I, for stupid reasons, had a affair 2 years ago. After my wife moving in with her parents for 7 months, we ended up working things out. Yea. Her parents, who live 3 states away, refuse to come to our home anymore. Her father is a very narcacistic freak that pretty much believes he created the earth. During our separation, he got in my face and I simply said " BAck off old man or you will regret it". As it turns out, nobody had ever stood up to him. He refuses to let go of that. My wife is suffering bc she has lost her family. She is the only (adopted) child. Her son continues to get packages from his grandparents (them) but my 2 sons get no recognition at all, simply bc they are my sons. My wife doesnt want to "burn bridges" as she says it but I can say that if it were my family, they would get more of an A@@ chewing than her parents do. To say that I would tell my family off is an understatement. They still want her to come back to Ohio. They miss her.... So much more crap has been said by her Dad but that doesnt matter. Help anyone !!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, lexilou  +, writes (17 September 2008):
 You hurt their daughter, she lived with them and they saw the pain and tears and helped her mend. Then she takes you back and they went through all that for nothing and cant understand how she could take back a man who cheated and hurt her. Thats what they may be feeling.
Your wife obviously loves you very much, has forgiven you and taken you back and now she has lost her parents because of it, the poor woman is stuck in the middle and is frightened of making everything worse.
I can see why everyone is acting as they do but it doesnt make it right. Her parents are punishing your children as they are part of you, completely wrong but you and your wife are powerless to do anything to change this. Shouting at them wont work it will make it worse.
Just be there for your wife, support her, love her and help her come to terms with this. Explain to your kids they have done nothing wrong and they are better off without these people in their life, you love them and are there for them always.
My two kids from a previous marriage used to get xmas cards etc from my husbands family saying grandson/granddaughter and signed grandma and granddad etc until we had a baby together. Now his brothers have started families and there are 3 'real' grandkids and one on the way they no longer get cards like that, they dont even buy them special ones just choose one out of a box and sign their names instead now. At first it hurt all of us but its just the way they are. I have recently find out however that all three of my kids, not just their 'real' grandson are named in their wills so they obviously do care, they just get it wrong sometimes and dont think.
Time might change things and they begin to visit when they realise your wife is sticking by you. You just have to be patient and polite and support your family x
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