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male
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*uddie25
writes: I have a fiance and we are in a long distance relationship. She lives in Japan and I live in the US right now. Recently she met some guy after I left and she is confused and doesn't know what to do. She asked me for time to think about who she should chose because she likes him or thinks he has qualities that I lack. I have always taken care of her and helped her when she needed it. I know this guy will take advantage of her and dump her like 99% of the Americans do that go to Japan for work. We have been together for two years and I am totally commited to our relationship and had planned on marrying her in March of 2007. I think she is being selfish by only thinking about her feelings instead of mine too. She feels lonely so she wants someone to be there for her even if it is only for a moment. I have three more months until I can take my vacation and go back to plan the wedding like we promised each other. What should I do?
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female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (16 April 2006):
 Wake up, she has found another bloke, this means she has strayed and is having an affair.
Why do you allow her to treat you in this awful way, no way on earth should you be considering marrying her, her engagment to you means nothing this she has proved.
Tell her that you have made up her mind for her and it is over!!
Hard but better to do this now than 12 months down the line, married and find she is having an affair as the woman obviously is fickle and want everything her way.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2006): Sorry. But be glad you found out she's fickle before it was too late. And I know you've sunk two years into this, and want to see the investment pay off. But surely you've had some good times, grown, learned new things, and have other things to be thankful for. Add to the list, thankful that you found out before you wasted more time, not to mention the wedding and more of your heart. Move on and find someone who *isn't* selfish and that you can truly rely upon.
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