A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I have met a guy I like and we have been out on a few dates. I have been to his place and it is really nice...elegant furniture and appliances. My place is ok but it does not compare and I am stressed out over having him come here.I have a very good job but have used my money for travel not decorating. Why am I so fearful to have him over?
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female
reader, chachacha  +, writes (2 March 2007):
Your question is key: Why am I so fearful to have him over?
Only you know the answer to this - as the other reply says, no doubt he won't mind in the slightest, and you probably know this - so what is your concern REALLY about?
Do you have any regrets about your choices in life - travel experience has greater longevity than furniture - have your parents criticised you or something?
Do you somehow feel you are not good enough? Why do you feel that?
It might be time for a little digging, maybe use a counsellor or therapist to help.
In the meantime, have the boyfriend over to your flat, which no doubt he'll love, and enjoy yourself.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2007): He'll understand (and won't mind that you don't spend as much money as he does on the place) if he really does want the relationship to progress further than just a few dates. If you really want to stop yourself from worrying before he visits your place tell him beforehand that you spend a bigger fraction of your salary on travelling around than decorating your home. That way you'll be at rest and he won't have a high expectation of your place (possibly leading to him being surprised at how nice it is). If all he's bothered about is materialistic things in the home then he isn't worth having a relationship with.
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