A ,
*onfused_gurl
writes: ok so here is my thing. Summer loves...Im sure you have heard a lot about them. Well I went to a camp for a week right? And I met this awesome guy. I can be myself around him, and do whatever, and he still looks at me the same. I looked really gross most the time, because c'mon its camp for pity sake, but he still looked at me like I was the prettiest thing he had seen. So I never persued anything because he lives a couple hours away from me, and so I wasnt sure if knowing a guy for a week would be good enough to last us through a year of long distance relationship..because my last long distance relationship didnt work out, and I had known the guy most of my life. And once school starts then I will be 4 hours away from him instead of just 2. But things were soooo different with him. I felt so different towards him than I did any other guy. But he never said anything to me either, and Im guessing it was for the same reason. I never got a chance to get his email address or anything, but his sister is gonna give it to me, since I knew her too. I dont know if I should try to start a relationship, or if I should just stay friends with him and see if next year at camp I still like him...or what I should do. I am soooo confused. If I stay just friends with him, then it will be lying to myself, because I do that a lot. I deny that I like a guy just to make other people not worry about me, and I start to convince myself of it for a while, and then it comes back to bite me in the butt. So I really dont know what to do. got any advice??? thanks in advance.
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female
reader, Bev Conolly +, writes (1 July 2005):
I can practically smell the burning brake pads, as you try to convince yourself not to go screaming head over heels for this guy!
You're being really sensible about this, so good on you. Keep your grip on control.
Long-distance relationships are hard, really hard. They're hard, even if you can drive and visit each other every couple of weeks, because you don't have that necessary level of intimacy with each other's lives. If you don't even have the option of taking a drive to visit, it's going to be practically impossible to keep things sparking romantically for the next year.
HOWEVER... it's not hard to be good friends by phone, text and email, and nobody can have too many friends.
I suggest that you go ahead and email him, maybe drop him a few lines about what a great time you had at camp, and talk about some of the experiences you had in common. See where the chat leads. Cultivate his friendship regardless of whether you think there's a chance for romance.
If you two really continue to hit it off, there's still phone and text - and at the risk of being branded a fossil, even postal mail! You can get to know each other very well that way, then in the future - who knows? If you're really well suited as a couple, then waiting a year to meet up mightn't kill off your attraction.
Good luck.
A
reader, becky05 +, writes (30 June 2005):
Why dont you stay friends for a little while, see how you get on and whether things might progress from there?
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