A
male
age
36-40,
*emorize
writes:hey guys, i have a simple small question to askI have thought about joining the army for awhile now and i was thinking i should do it but the problem is, i dont want to leave my girlfriend behind, i dont trust her to say that she'll wait for me and really do it. im not the kind of person to be able to understand or take easily that she has cheated, or moved on because she is unable to wait, only if she says that she would wait.theres the other option of letting her go before i join, but then i wouldnt be able to get her off my mind and to think if she would just go around dating or sleeping with other people right away, i wouldnt be able to do it. it wouldnt be a mentally healthy thing before i join the army.any advice? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Jamer70  +, writes (23 October 2007):
 i have to also say you cant have you cake and eat it too. I believe that you should think of your long term life and future.
Do you believe thearmy can give you the life you want, do you believe you and your girlfriend will be together forever.
The right thing to do now is talk to her and say what you wanna do and your army intentions. See her reaction im guessing it wont be too great but its the right thing to do here.
What ive said isnt exactly making sense as im writing it as its comes but to sum up.
Ask yourself where you wanna be in 10 years and if its a real possibility. Army or Girl. If you think army talk to your girlfriend and see what she says.
you may not have your cake or you could
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (23 October 2007):
 You sound like you want to build a life with this girl, so why jeopardise it? You are right, a lot of women need their spouses to actually be present during a relationship. Not to say that a lot of army spouses arent happy, but the spouse must be the type of person to be comfortable having a partner who is very rarely at home. So in a sense you are limiting your choice, but there are plenty of girls who want to marry an armed forces soldier its just you dont know if your girl is one. Moreover, you seem reluctant to want to test the waters so to speak.
Basically you cant have your cake and eat it too, i.e the perfect relationship and your career in the army. As you have said yourself you will be constantly worried. So you have two options: join the army or stay with girlfriend. Make the call.
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