A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I have a massive crush on an older man. When I say older he's in his 40s and am in my 20s. I can't avoid him as he works local and I'm a stay at home mum so guaranteed to bump into him daily.When I see him I do get all nervous and awakered. He used to speak to me all the time but since I have started developing feelings for him. I admit I have been too nervous to speak to him. So he doesn't say hi anymore. Kinda my fault. Its not that I don't want to speak to him even though I know that's what he will think. I'm just too nervous round him. What can I do to show him I like him. For e.g he seen me the other day on the street I was at the top he shouted on me and I kept walking pretending I couldn't hear him, as I got too nervous. Today he seen me and I thought right I'm going to speak to him. But he just got in his car and drove off. Do you blame him? What can I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2015): Yes I'm married but I would be as well to be a single mother. He gives us a good life but we never see him due to his work.
Our daughter is 2 and we agreed I'd stay home until she can go to school.
I guess I know I shouldn't have a crush on the other man but truth is I do, he used to give me lots of attention now since I have started avoiding him. He hardly speaks to me. I don't think he knows am married as well I don't even see my husband most of the time.
I want to get rid of the awarded feeling we both have and get on with him again.
I just don't trust myself around him, or him for that matter. So yes I have avoided him.
How do I get over this and get to know him again?
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (24 March 2015):
 IS he married? Are you? (or are you in a relationship?)
Because if EITHER of you are married or dating someone the CRUSH is irrelevant.
And I have to say, your behavior is pretty peculiar for someone who claims to have a crush. My guess is he think you are either afraid of him or disgusted by him, judging by your reactions.
He is JUST another dude.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2015): Your behavior doesn't make any sense if you have a crush on the man. You've only spoken to each other briefly; you've never really had an actual conversation.
You must be married or in a committed-relationship, if you're a stay-at-home mother. You're nervous, because you know you shouldn't be talking to another man. Don't leave out details. Somebody IS working and paying the bills, if you're able to stay at home.
If you're feeling lonely and neglected; talk to the man you're supposed to be talking to. Your husband or boyfriend.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (24 March 2015):
 If you are married then do nothing. If you are divorced or a single mum and he's single too, then you decide if you want to see what he's about. A lot of crushes are toned down once you see him as like any other guy, nothing special. When you get to know him face to face and talk about regular things you would notice he has flaws too. The nervous feelings which you are talking about can be sexual tension. I only felt them when I was about to leave my ex husband. Right now I am in a good marriage so I can't imagine having feelings like this towards another man.
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