A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm sick of missing him so much :(Had a relationship with a man for 5 years during which time 99.9% of the time he was a perfect gentleman and the most amazing kind of man who I thought I was so lucky to find but now and then maybe once every 8 or 9 months he would lose his temper and punch a door or throw something.It happened 6 weeks ago again and we had a blazing row. Usually within a couple of days he's contacted me saying how sorry he is and we sort it out but this time nothing at all and I think it could be over for good.I know what he does isn't right and it stems from nowhere it's not like we have a blazing argument before and I know I need to find someone that doesn't have a temper problem like this but his good points are SO good and I don't want to throw it all away because of this even though I probably should. I haven't heard from him and I hate to admit that I'm missing him
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female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (29 July 2014):
 OP, his 99.9% of the time behavior matters 0%! Are you waiting for that 0.1% of the time to result in you being seriously hurt? It only takes one temper tantrum of his to put you in hospital or worse, a grave yard. Things could actually get to that point you know. Don't go against what you already know; he isn't good for you because of his temper. It will be hard to miss him and have nothing to do about it but who ever said it would be easy? Just leave him alone. It's time to ignore that little voice that keeps making you go back to him. Take time to do things that distract you from the thought of him. You need to move on and live for you and when you're ready again you can find someone best suited for you. Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2014): You're second-guessing your better judgement. I don't care if he behaves 99.9% the time. He has to control his temper 100% of the time. Apparently it was bad enough to scare you out of his life! Go ahead and miss him, that's okay. He's someone very dear to you. Outbreaks of temper isn't something you want be around, and you don't raise children in such an environment. It's frightening.
Making yourself vulnerable to his temper is too high a price to pay for having him around. He'll scare the "missing-him" out of you, if he loses his temper a few more times around you.
Find something to get him out of your mind. Don't sit around reminiscing about the good old-days. A man's rage is unhealthy and potentially dangerous. Go attach your feelings to someone who doesn't have temper-management issues. They're more deserving. So are you!
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