A
female
 ,
*rizzylizzy
writes:Hi, I have been going out with this guy for nearly a year. We were totally full on to begin with as he was away travelling. We moved in together in April. In the last few weeks I noticed he has cooled off a little bit and I have been trying extra hard to get a bit of attention off him. In the last 2 weeks I have been off work with an ankle injury. I was pretty down about it and this was when the paranoia got worse. I suddenly started to fear I would loose him!! I have tried to speak to him about it and he has told me I am paranoid and I have nothing to worry about. Now I expected him to say that but in some sort of loving way, not the way that I was annoying him!! Am I being mentally paranoid or do you think there is something wrong, Living together is fine, we have the usual arguements but nothing major. I feel like there has been a shift in power and now I am terrified I will loose him and I am falling over myself to do anything he needs!!!! I don't like feeling like this and I was wondering does any one know how to help me go back to normal and take a bit of power back in the relationship.
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female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (18 July 2011):
 to get things on an even level you have to become a little less involved with him. go out with your friends, have interests of your own, it will give you other thing to think about and stuff to talk to him about. maybe you are feeling worse because you have been stuck at home more, unable to work and have more time to think (and worry!) about things. don't pester him about your insecure feelings, get it off your chest by blogging or speaking to your girlfriends/mum. he is bound to be less attentive now that you are living together than when he was away travelling. he probably feels like he can relax now and not make as much of an effort.
get a life of your own, see how it goes, do this for about 2 months and if he still shows disinterest speak to him about it
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