A
female
age
26-29,
*eace-lily
writes:I'm about 10 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend has just told me he doesn't know if he loves me or wants to be with me.We have always known that we need to make more effort with each other, however which his lazy attitude he just never has. So I saw problems along with himHe recently went away and since he's been back is now telling me he's now sure about us.I spend most of my time when he's not around crying and have no idea what I'm supposed to do! I feel absolutely lost and hate being around him knowing he hasn't made up his mind. I have never loved anyone as much as I have him and we've been together for over 5 years.He says he wants to try to sort it out but now I just feel neglected and alone.I don't want to lose him, but I'm in such a state and have no idea how to handle this. He says he's not sure about us but he wants a family with me and immediately put a stock to any thoughts regarding a possible abortion. Please help me!
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (30 September 2015):
 You two have been together for 5 years and it has not been till we went away that he started having doubts? I call BS on him. I'd seriously question what happened while he was away to make him doubt the two of you. My best guess? Another girl (now nothing might have happened with her but he might be thinking "greener grass" here. Or that a new GF wouldn't want so much from him as you do (which I think is only really natural after 5 years that you give more of yourself to your partner than a whole new partner).
He had been fine being with you these 5 years AS LONG as he didn't have to go the extra distance (which he would have had to if you two are to raise a child).
He might also have a case of cold feet.
Was the pregnancy planned?
If I were you, I would sit down and decide WHAT you want to do. Abortion, adoption or keep it and be a single mom. It is your choice and it seems like your BF is not really much of a help on that issue. He mentions abortion, because that would get him off the hook emotionally and financially in case you two really don't work out.
Can you afford a child on your own? Do you have a support-system? (without counting on him at all)
You are in a tough spot and you have little time to consider this. So whatever choice you make, make the one that is RIGHT for you. Because in the end, YOU are the one who has to deal with it, no matter what you chose.
You are 18-21? so you two are both pretty young and my guess HE is a bit immature. It's not unreasonable to see why he is backpedaling. He isn't up for the job.
*hugs*
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (30 September 2015):
 Peace-lily.... Please read and re-read your submittal as many times as necessary until you see that you are pregnant by a man-child who cares not a whit about you. Is this the kind of guy you want around your child?
Decide if you want to carry to term... then, decide if you want to raise your child by yourself... or, perhaps, put your child up for adoption. THIS CREATURE HAS TIPPED HIS HAND... AND HE WILL BE NO HELP AND NO PARENT (and no "partner" for you!!!).....
Good luck...
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A
male
reader, dougbcoll +, writes (30 September 2015):
 he was willing to have sex with you, have his fun with you, but when HE gets you pregnant all off a sudden he is looking for an exit.
he needs to man up be responsible for his actions. " he says he wants to try to sort it out but now i just feel neglected and alone". what is there to sort out he needs to man up, grow up, stop being a boy. i am sorry you are going through this.
you may not get support you should get from him, look toward your family, church ect...
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