A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been single for quite a while now and over the years I've spent a lot of time 'observing' other people in relationships and what not and even browsing on here and seeing how many people are in messed up situations when it comes to 'love'. I'm starting to think there is no such thing as love; rather it's all just lust with dependency. Thoughts? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2012): Love is what we call it when the relationship is healthy and mutually beneficial.
Unhealthy attachment is what we call it when the relationship is full of drama and causes hurt to the people involved.
Whether the relationship will be love or unhealthy attachment will depend on how mentally and emotionally sound both people in the relationship are.
There can't be love if your partner has unresolved issues or destructive habits and thought patterns. Or if you do.
A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (26 April 2012):
 It is not as simple as people needing sex, money and exploit each other.
There are two kinds of love. Dramatic love and peaceful love. Relationships can teach you a lot about yourselves. Your partner is a mirror of your soul. You project your fears and insecurities onto that person. When a relationship does not work out you learn that you can only change or accept yourself. The more dramatic the relationship, the more things you have to resolve within yourself. The peaceful love is being content with everything. A natural state of mind, and total acceptance of yourself and the world.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2012): I've actually been thinking about this question too, sometimes I just feel so lost, because relationships that I've had in my life and my friends' relationship problems just made me think a lot. Sometimes I feel love, but sometimes the feeling just goes away, and sometimes it's just all lust. I have a bf, I love him a lot.. however I believe he cheated on me so it made me think I really love him for me to be able to still stick with this relationship. But lately I feel I'm attracted (sexually) to someone else... and I totally forgot about the probs with my bf... I think its also because I was too disappointed in my bf (he's been cheating and lying for god knos how many times, and we have trust issues). I still have the "love" feeling for him, when I look back, I still felt the presence of "love" specially when I was still in school, it's so sweet. So yes, I still believe there such thing as "love" however, it will start to lose some meaning as a person grows older and starts to realize how powerful "lust" can be. But I believe when we get even older, we will get to taste different meanings of "love", and it only depends on what "kind" of love you want to look for... because LOVE always changes its shape as we age, according different relationships we had.We all love differently, don't you think? Who are we to judge who is right / wrong? I know my bf loves me, I can feel it, but he cheated... so does it make that not "love"? I don't know either... : ( And now I'm attracted to someone else, can I say I don't love my bf? I doubt...
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