A
male
age
30-35,
*ossMcGowan
writes:i have felt that i am beginning to get lonelier and lonelier. i stay with just my mum and we never talk. like for 5 minutes a day at the most. she just argues a lot and that and i dont bother with her and there isnt much you can talk to your mum about anyway and i dont want to. i see my gf about 3 times a week if im lucky for a couple of hours at the most. im in my last year at school and dont go in much. i tend to fall unwell very often too. i like never ever see my friends like at all n none of my friends like phone each other. also out of about 7 of my closest friends, none of them like people staying or staying with people so i can never get them over to stay.i constantly feel lonely n its getting me down. im considering moving into my own flat with someone and i want to know what you think. i also wanted a dog or something but my mum wont allow it coz shes stubborn. ive been like this for a long long time now. like over the past 3 years while me and my gf have been going out, ive parted slowly from my friends so now i dont see them much. 50% are now junkies so i dont bother with them and i dont like being in their company sort of thing. someone suggested joining a club but there are no clubs or anything nearby and i cant even think of a type of club to join so that is out of the question. so im just wondering what you think and what you think i should do, how i tackle it like changing things, anything really lol i just need help and obviously loneliness is leading to unhappiness. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): hey
i hav a friend who phoned me other day, hes in sort of same situation as u, his mum is barley around, his dad has new fam, when he is away from uni and at home he has no friends..
first off, have u spoken to your gilfriend about how you feel?
secondly ae you working? try and get the local newspaper and apply for some jobs, you local job seekers will help you build up a cv and stuff, maybe working could lead you to meet some new friends
there is also the internet. you could join sites such as facebook.com or my space, and add friends who have same intrest as you. i reckon sometimes msn is really handy when you feel lonley.
there plenty of clubs you could join, maybe even sports, go down to your local lesuire/community centre and find out about swimming classes, karate/judo/boxin classes for beginers, footi groups. Take your girlfriend along to some footi matches or movies.
sometimes, u shoundnt wait around for people to call or text you..you should jus go for it and text ur mates..ask if they want to go to the movies or bowling or something, ask how they are, what theyre up too, you could even phone them.
go to concerts, join a fanclub online, make friends like that. dont be afraid to make the first move and ask people how they are, what their intrests are.
remember not to come on tooo strong...you might come across as a little weird even tho youre not..:)
remember, if you do feel like this is getting you proper low, speak to your mum or teachers..sounds daft...teachers are boring and strict..but they are humans too..go to a teacher you trust...are there any local youth clubs in your area? go to your local council website and search for youth clubs...should be plenty of usefull links...if not...use your time alone to complain to the council...they should provide something for u!
mean while,,while youre alone...write about how u feel..paint what you feel...it can be really motivating to be alone and use your skills to focus on stuffff...maybe even homework 8-)
watch telly too lol..i would if i was u..lots of telly, if ur planning on going to college or uni...(which i suggest you do cuz then you get your own dorms and flat) ull make plenty of friends there. (by the way most often you can get help paying for uni and coll fees from your local council)
sometimes the lonliest place to be is in a crowd, keep that in mind...but...i hope i helped...
lots of luck and god bless
friend xxx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 March 2008): You keep making excuses. There are none.
Get a good job, save the money and move out somewhere, either by yourself or with someone.
Nothing good will come to you if you just sit there and wait. You clearly are growing beyond your friends here. Nothing you can do but go out somewhere.
I'm pretty sure there are Rotary clubs, yoga clubs or other clubs. You probably haven't even tried to look.
Get off your ass and get out there. Thats all there is to it.
Flynn 24
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