A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am so frustrated. I've been married for 13 years and have 4 children. I'm only 32, but hate sex and don't know why. I love my husband and we are very happy, but over the last year I have no sex drive at all. I have sex with him, just to make him happy. It's not that it doesn't feel good, but it just makes me resent him. I don't understand y I'm like this. He has more of a sex drive than ever and I feel like a failure because I can't be the same way. Help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2013): You should firstly go see a doc to make sure it's not a medical issue. You may feel perfectly fine and healthy OP but there can be a lot of reasons for losing your libido, hormone imbalance, early onset of menopause etc.Maybe you have a lot of stress of in your life, even if it's not high stress, long term minor stress levels can really screw with your system.Go to a doc and get advice from them OP. If you've always had a fairly active sex drive then maybe something is up.It could be a lot of things but I'd start with the medical. I mean maybe your hubby has gained a lot of weight or become less attractive in other ways. Maybe he's stopped trying to get you aroused and sex is just so mundane that you're bored with it. Lots of reasons it could be OP. Time to discover what it is.
A
female
reader, Dear Mandy  +, writes (18 April 2013):
 HI
Alot of women go through this and I can totally understand as I have been there. What your feeling ( I feel ) is you resent him because you are the wife, the mother, the cook, the cleaner, the ironer, and the sexual provider. So you feel your giving everything you have for little in return I.E passion, romance, dating, being spoiled like you used to be before the children. do you ever have time alone? do you ever go out just the two of you ,for a meal or even just a romantic stroll?
you need to get this spark back into the marriage, I really think you should talk to your husband about how your feeling, he may feel the same. It's the only way to move forward from this. Also does he help with any housework? or seeing to the kids ? it could help if he did. if he works then maybe you could compromise by saying he does the chores on the weekends. if you both work then the chores should be shared equally. if you both have different shifts I.E one works lates one works early, then you could do a rota on who does what and when. And when it comes to the children if they are of young age then you could take it in turns on who gets them bathed and ready for bed, take turns in helping with any homework or after school activites.however if your children are older and can take care of them selfs then you should both be making plans to go out together alone atleast once a week. If everything is shared it will take the pressure off you both and your sex drive will soon come flooding back I asure you . :)
Mandy x
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