A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I work with the most gorgeous man I have ever known, and I don't just meant physically. He is is just a wonderful person. I get butterflies when he talks to me and when we sit down to lunch together we always just click with eachother. We're good friends. I started developing feelings for him about 2 months ago but knew he had a girlfriend and that things were pretty serious so I just didn't do anything about it. I just let it go and carried on as normal, just as his friend. It's been complete torture, and there is chemistry there, but neither fo us does anything about it. I woudl have been happy to leave it at that, because there's other fish in the sea. But the toher day he was driving me to the train station and whe he stopped the car, we just sort of said our goodbyes, and then he leaned in and gave me the most wonderful kiss on the lips. no tongues, it was just really sweet and lingering. As soon as he pulled away he said he was sorry and that he was out of line and he shouldn't have done it. I know all that is true, but the problem is, since the kiss, all the feelings I have for him which I've usually surpressed have come back really strong . What do I do? I dno't want to be responsible for splitting up him and his girlfriend, and I know he shouldnt of kissed me, but he did, and i have feelings for him and now I'm just confused.
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female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (29 April 2008):
Tell him that although the kiss shouldn't have happened you really wanted it to.
But then tell him you can't see him while he has a girlfriend because it is not fair on her. Tell him you really think you could be great together but that he has to decide because otherwise you are going to get really hurt.
Then back off. Sit with other people at lunch, just be his friend and don't get too close to him again. Don't be alone with him because it will be too easy for that kiss to happen again and then you will just be the girl he's having an affair with. He'll have you but not want to hurt his girlfriend so will try and have both for as long as he can.
Hopefully he will split up with his girlfriend and then after a while you two can get together and live happily ever after. If not then you'll have to get over him.
Start looking in the papers to see if there is another job you could escape to. Nothing can distract you like a promotion and a pay rise.
Good Luck!! xx
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