A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyone, I'm a bit confused with how i feel and would really value any advice. I'm a fresher at uni and basically i have been getting with this third year called P who is ridiculously good looking, tall and really cool and funny but i only ever talk to him when i'm drunk and we don't really see each other apart from this but we always end up making out when we go out at the same time. If he walks past he'll smile but thats about it, i don't really know him. Then there's this other boy called H who is one of my closest friends and recently told me he liked me. I never really thought about H in this way before because everyone thought he liked my friend. When he first said he like me i said no, i definitely see you more as a brother but now we text alot and im confused about whether i actually do like him. He's really dorky and no where near as cool as P but i i think i get jealous when H gets with other girls and he makes me smile. I don't know what to do, firstly i don't want to ruin our friendship if i did like him and i'm worried i may only like him because i like the fact he likes me (if that makes sense haha) and i also don't know whether to see if P will actually ever ask for my number and then i could get to know him better and see if i like him?? I don't want to miss an opportunity either way, but i'm worried im leaving it too late for H because i already said no and he'll move on ahhh!xxxx
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female
reader, Anastasia  +, writes (9 June 2012):
 Hi,
Let's see...you only talk to him when you're drunk and when you do get to the same place he is in....you drunkingly make out with him. I'm sorry darling but you're just a playful drunk make out partner to this guy. The reason he smiles at you is because he is having a flash back to a drunken night when he had his hand up your shirt. He will never ask for your number or want anything beyond a bit of drunk fondling and groping. Sorry. But that's how guys think.
I get from your letter that your other guy, H genuinely likes you. If you didn't like him then, what makes you think you are liking him that way now? Is it because P isn't giving you the attention that you want? It would be really unfair and cruel for you to lead H on if you know you are just using him to fill a void. If you are not sure how you feel...then do nothing. Nobody can sort your feelings out but you. You get jealous you said when H goes out with other girls. Ask yourself..is it cause the attention is moving from you or you actually rather be with him?
H from what you say is a sweet guy, don't turn him into something bad by breaking his heart. If you are not interested in him truly....don't lead him on. P will not ask you out. Accept that and move on from it.
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