A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my bf for a year we agreed to get married in july this year but he asked me to extend our time to december so we did. Last night i asked him if we still getting married in december and he said he needed more time as he is having problems. I said we didnt have to have a cermony or such if he was worried financially he said money was not the issue and that he has to solve his family problems out first. I said december is ages away and that his family problems should be solved by then he said he didnt want to talk abt this as he has enough on his plate. Should i leave him or be patient? i love him and i know for a fact he loves me but i want to get married as my religion does not allow sex before marriage and am sick of waiting. Please give ur honest feedback. Thanks.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): I didnt call him all day today he called before he was sad tat i didnt contact hm i said i wanted hm to tel me if we are stil getting married in december or nt and tht i do sympathise hs family problems and tht we all have problems and tht a year ago we made a promise to each other plus december is ages away so he said if i cn giv hm one month so i said u have until the end of march so i wil see wt he says in tht month i wil focus on supporting hm and being a patient gf i guess
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): I don't think dating two other guys is a good idea. To your boyfriend, he may consider you to be cheating. Why are you in such a hurry to get marry? If you want to have sex, be patient. I've read and heard many times that marriages don't last longer than 2 years (7 year is the "number" that most marriages don't get past) because the girl rushes the guy into marriage. If you dated for a year, how come you can't wait until he's ready? And family problems are not quickly solved. They take forever!To be honest, if you keep pressuring him, he may leave you instead. He's got a lot on his plate already and men don't like when their women aren't being supportive. Or not listening to their problems.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2011): Sweetheart, if you're in love with the guy who you's best for you, then nothing will keep you apart.
Allow yourself a break. Date at least 2 other guys.
If -- HE COME BACK TO YOU-- after you've each had some space for each other, then you're relationship will be better because you'll have recognized what you respect in one another while you took some serious time apart.
Good luck with everything dear. Don't go back to him after he's put off a wedding, no matter what the reason is!
Your relationship needs to be strong right now to be ready for marriage now, but having a marriage is a relationship that is priority in your life.
His honor for his family is amiable, but his delay to make you a part of it is not healthy for either of you, which is why you shouldn't be the one to go back to him after you've given him space.
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