A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am 41 years old and I started dating a 34 year old. I do not think he has any previous experience with women and I do not think he knows how to please a woman orally or even in bed. He is a great guy, very gentle but how would I let him know that I need to feel wanted and 'taken' once in a while? I am starting to feel like a nympho when in fact I do know I am normal. Saying "I am tired" when he is with me and I want sex is unexcusable. I am sexually frustrated and mad.
View related questions:
sexually frustrated Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2008): Starting an argument isn't going to help her is it? I never said, nor insinuated that it was her fault. The fact is that if everything else in the relationship is fine, then giving up the relationship to "trade them in for someone younger" is aweful advice. Especially since if it was the other way round that would be seen as chauvanistic.
Truth is that in situations like this the other person doesn't know they are doing something wrong and unless they communicate he will never know how his actions are affecting her.
If your advise is to turn around and walk away from someone who in her words is a "great guy" without trying to resolve the problem then I feel sorry for you. Should I walk away from my partner if she suddenly wasn't interested in sex for a week? Or would I be better off talking to her and trying to take the initiative to try and solve the problem?
I know what I would do.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 September 2008): Wow "trade him in for someone younger"? If that advise had been given by a man to a man then people would be outraged. Plus, I didn't read her ever saying she wanted rid of him.
In my opinion you need to tell him how you feel. Dressing up sexy for him and telling him how you want it and then when it's finished let him know how you'd like him to suprise you with that in the future would work wonders.
Plus tell him what you want because contrary to popular belief men aren't mindreaders!
...............................
A
female
reader, Lilly Rose  +, writes (30 September 2008):
 Let me tell you the nice and gentle guys can learn to be great in bed.....so dont give up hope just yet. First try the whole dressing up etc if that doesnt work invest in a spank pad and some handcuffs etc....expriement together....if hes not into all that he may just enjoy the love making and closeness of it which still can be great. The whole oral thing you need to guide him....let him know what u like...maybe hes just shy but you can work on it....if hes good to you in other ways dont just throw it away coz the sex isnt mind blowing. Ask him what turns him on etc and work from there.
...............................
|
