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female
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anonymous
writes: I am very self conscious. To put it bluntly, I hate how I look. Any guy who has ever taken the time to get to know me really likes my personality, but they never like me for anything more than a "friend" and it's eating me up inside. I know I'm overweight, but it's not because I eat hoards and do nothing... in fact I am very active. It's because I have a medical condition that I can't do anything about.There is this guy I really like, he's has an amazing personality and it good looking to boot... but my lack of confidence is screwing everything up. I've only ever talked to him once, but that was enough for me to know he is one of those once in a lifetime kind of guys. I would like to see more of him... but he is older and goes to school quite far away and I am afraid that if I don't speek up I will lose him. It's like there's a brick wall...HELP!Now to my questions:1) how much of a guy's opinion of a girl is based on looks?2) how can I boost my confidence?3) how can I get a conversation going?4) how can I show him I am interested? thank you in advance xxx
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male
reader, tux  +, writes (5 August 2006):
 1) I will not mislead you here. Looks are a lot of what people look at.. I will not mislead you more... Looks are what are just perceived differently by different people. A lot of things can be done in this department. Wear what looks good on you. Do not wear something just because everyone else is wearing it or just because it is suppose to be "sexy." A lot about looking good is believing in yourself that you are good looking.
2) You just need to think it. That's the easy part.. believing it is the hardest which you also need to do. Wake up each morning and say..."Today is a great day. I'm beautiful." then walk up to your mirror and say it again. and walk throughout the day remembering it.
3) Find a topic about something you both are into. That's the easy way... That's all I can really think of on that portion.
4) Besides running up to him... jumping on him and kissing him all over.. which I would not recommend.. talk to him... compliment him.. a few "suggestive" winks might not hurt either..
Bottom line is he may or may not be interested. But keep in mind just because he isn't, doesnt mean noone else is or may be.. Just believe in yourself and be happy. Love will find you.
A
female
reader, sim sam 2013 +, writes (5 August 2006):
Well it seems to me that you are very shy. So first of all to lots of boys it does matter what you look like but that just means they are fools for not liking the real beauty inside. and second of all to boost your confidence you can always go in a club where you have to perform in front of people so you wont be so shy. and third is to get a conversation going do something spectacular dont show off or nothing just be yourself and he will come around. And last compliment him on stuff that you liked like say i really liked that maybe we can get together and you can teach me how. The key to it is not to be shy and just have fun and be yourself if he doesnt come around after that he is clearly not interested at the time. remebmer*** if he doesnt relize the true beauty inside of you then forget him and move on the someone who does relize the beauty. Because everyone is ounce in a lifetime but there is always someone out there better for you.
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