A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey everyone! Hope someone can give me some advice. I'm in a really great relationship with a guy I really care about, but I seem to be in danger of ruining it in the same way that I have several of my previous relationships. The other night my boyfriend said to me: 'You need to make more decisions when we go out. Tell me what to do!' He makes lots of decisions at work, and he doesn't want to have to at home - which I find reasonable. However, apart from naturally being quite an easy going shy sort of person, and being happy to let another person make decisions about what we do and where we go etc, I'm also scared about the consequences of my making a wrong decision. I feel that if I were to choose the wrong thing, that I may upset things and make everything fall apart. I'm too scared of losing someone through making a mistake, that I end up ultimately pushing them away. Obviously, I'm putting too much importance on little decisions, but I don't know how to change! Any suggestions would be much appreciated!
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2010): Your boyfriend WANTS you to make deicisions. With making decisions, there should be no right or wrong answer. If he gets mad at the decision you make then you'll just have to remind him that that's what he wanted you to do and if he's not happy with it than oh well. If you two are in a serious relationship, you BOTH should be making decisions together. It shouldn't be just one person doing all the thinking. If you both want to be happy then you need to work together.
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