A
female
age
30-35,
*ose22
writes:dear readers, ok here is the thing i want to have sex. i have in a wonderful relationship with a guy i have been with for 3 years and we are both ready. the crux is my mum always told me that i should come to her and ask for the birth control first. i have a really good relationship with my mum ans i can talk to her about a lot of stuff. the thing is though im her girl and im scared about telling her a want the pill. she trusts me and my bf, so she knows we will use every protection we have. but im just petrified about asking her. now it come to it and im ready i just don't know how to get the words out right.does anyone have any ideas on how i could word this to her?
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male
reader, boxOfWisdom  +, writes (27 March 2011):
Well my gf has the same relationship with her mum as u do with urs exept that when my gf told her mum we were haveing sex her mum actualy suggested to me my gf that condoms were shit and that the pill was better, awkward moment, but at least now me and my gf have someone to go to if we need anythin, so, i would just go up to her and say mum can i talk to u, i feel as though its time for me to go on the pill, im telling u this in trust that u will reapect my decision, and i hope u will agree that it is time, and then u can add ur own little ending, butvthat should work :) good luck
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2011): I don't see the problem here, since you already touched the subject with your mom, so the ice is already broken. You are really lucky to have a mom like that. Most girls, including me, can't imagine talking to their mom about sex. It is a taboo topic. Telling my mom I got my first period was the most embarrassing moment of my life. I could never ever talk to her about sex.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (26 March 2011):
 No-one knows your mother like you do and you need to use that personal insight to tackle this difficult situation. At 16 you should be able to access the contraceptive pill from a doctor without parental consent. However, it is a good idea that relatives know what medication you take in case of an emergency situation. Therefore you should just tell your mother. She may react more positively than you think - it is a sign of being mature and responsible. However, if you don't think she is ready for the whole truth, why not do a half-truth. Tell her you are taking the pill for non-sexual reasons. Some women take it to regulate their cycle or reduce period pain for instance. Make sure you follow the pill instructions to the letter as it is only an effective form of contraception if used correctly.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2011): It sounds like you and your mother have a great relationship! It would be a shame to jeopardize that by going behind her back about this. She clearly cares loads about you and just wants to be sure that you are safe and well, emotionally and physically.Sit her down and explain that you've thought about your relationship with your boyfriend a lot and that you've decided it's time for you both to go to the next level. Be clear that this is what you want and that you're not being pressured into it. Say that you know it must be odd for her to see her little girl growing up, but that it's an important decision for you and that you wanted to be able to come to her for help and advice. If you show that you're mature, and have thought about the emotional and physical effects of this, I am sure she will be understanding. I know it's a bit embarrassing, but all she wants is for you to be safe and well. If that's too difficult, why not write it down in a letter. Begin by explaining that you're just too embarrassed to talk to her, but that you want her to be involved. Leave it for her while you're at school and tell her you'll talk to her when you get back.Good luck/.
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