A ,
*ngel-lee
writes: Hello, this has taken me alot of courage because i know what people may think but i am asking you all to please not be judgemental of me. I have been with my partner for 2 years, i really care for him alot, the problem is that i got together with him about a month after i had split up with my ex of 5 years, now i think about it, i think it was a rebound thing. He is the most wonderful bloke, dont get me wrong, he's caring and kind and perfect in every way but recently i have been feeling like he is not the one for me and that i was going to end it. I started realising that maybe i didnt feel as strongly about him as i once thought when i started having feelings for his friend, this all started about a month ago, i was trying to sort my own feelings out before i went ahead and made a decision. Anyway to cut a long story short, i have been on the pill now since i was 14 and i am now 22, i have always taken the pill correctly every day at the same time every morning, i have taken it religously all this time, i done 2 pregnancy tests 2 weeks ago and it turns out i am pregnant! i havent had any illness that should stop the pill from working not sickness or anything. I dont know what to do, on one hand i keep thinking, no one will ever treat me better than this man, no one will ever love me better, so i mite aswell have this baby anyway and on the other hand, i keep thinking about how i felt about his friend and how much i wish i could fall in love so deeply again like i did with my ex, i just dont know what to do. Im not a stupid little girl, i know what im doing, my mum feel pregnant at 23 and she was also on the pill since a young age. I dont know what to do, my heads so messed up!
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female
reader, Jadzia1127 +, writes (27 May 2006):
Do you want to keep this baby or not? This is decision will completely change your life one way or another and it has nothing to do with what guy you want to be with. You didn't mention it being a dilemma so I'm assuming you plan on keeping your baby.
Most doctors will give advice against any big life changes during pregnancy because of the chemicals rushing through your body that make false emotions. Wait until after the baby comes and you have had time to bond with your baby to make any big decisions. You also need to let your baby's father in on what is going on. The father of your baby will now be part of your life, for the rest of your life.
If you feel completely void of feelings toward your current BF then consider moving in with your family while being pregnant. But you need to keep those lines of communication open for the sake of your baby.
A side note: If your mother got pregnant on the pill then you have a good chance that the pill wouldn't work for you. Some families just have it in the genes, there are alternate birth controls you need to look into after your baby comes.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2006): Hi Angel-lee,
A difficult decision - One thing I can think of saying is that honesty is usually the best way to go in big life problems like this.
Don't get held up on thoughts like "no one will ever treat me better" because it's simply not true, you're using that as a reason because you are scared of being alone.
Make decisions on what you think is the right thing to do. Not right for you, but right in respecting other people. Don't make choices out of fear from your insecurities because those kind of choices never work in the end any way.
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