A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello , i just want to know if its just my mind or if its actually happening !!im in a long distance relationship and believe me when i say my gf and i were soooooo much inlove , i still love her though like crazy but we had our ups and downs and we broke up for a while then we got bk , but like we say , its nva the same, she doesnt show her love to me how she used to. we re not even talking as much as how we used to . she basically hangin out with her friends the whole time and with her best male friend that she kissed when we were on a break :S i just dont feel secure anymore , i know she would never cheat on me but im still having these thoughts sometimes when i sit by myself thinkin maybe shes with some1 right now. or even with her best male friend that she kissed before :S and then i start having those crazy thoughts and it jst makes me so angry, i dnt even feel healthy anymore coz my mind is constantly thinkin abt her and what she would be possibly doing out there . i love her like crazy and i wanna spend the rest of my life with her. do u think i should really trust her, coz i really do , i nva trusted a girl like this before, but lately it feels really shit.what do ug uys think about this .thank you
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female
reader, Sally_A  +, writes (29 December 2010):
i think being in a LDR b4 makes me understand what u're going thruwhy do we trust some people and not others ??? the answer is simple! because the people we trust usually don;t show us any "suspected behaviors" of being cheaters, while the people we don't trust, do.the first thing we should ask, are you having these thought about her being unfaithful based on real rational facts? i guess you are... bcz she kissed the guyBUT she kissed him while you were appart... was she drunk, was she playing truth or dare... alot of other stuff that could've encouraged her to do that??and that leads to the next question and that would be... would you have kissed ur best girl friend while u were on a break with ur gf?if you really love her, talk to her about ur feelings, talk to her about EVERYTHING you have to say, about what u're going thru now and what u're thinking ofi think if she truly loves you she'll understand and she'll explain to u... if she doesn't than she doesn;t deserve yousince u're together now... i think it would make the relationship stronger if you suggested "meeting up" with her.. and it would make you see how she acts and reacts around you... and it will make things clearer for you...if you have the money i'd say go for it... best of luck and i hope everything will be ok
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2010): Its pretty normal for you to be paranoid in a long distance relationship, but if you really trust her then you wouldnt be thinking about that so much, you need to calm down. Like they say hope for the best but expect the worst. You have to let go till you have prove shes actually up to something
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2010): ok, so it's clear you can't go on like this.
why not sit down and have a long heart to heart with your girlfriend about this? you should try be as understanding with each other as possible but ultimately try figure out whats best for you both and make sure that you both want the same things.
It's understandable that jealousy should occur in relationships but actions speak louder than words and the fact that you've still continued to trust her despite these thoughts says alot. it's obvious that you love her so there is no reason that if you are both willing then you can't get this relationship back on track. :)
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