A
male
age
36-40,
*ndy00
writes:This is an inconvenient truth for me... I've realized that I'm only ever truly happy when I am in a relationship.I love the feeling of being loved and I absolutely loving making someone else feel special. For me, nothing in life is better. Unfortunately when I'm without, I crave it. I don't know why it affects me as much as it does. It could be that I miss the person when we break up and miss their company, but whatever it is, all the girls I love and lose leave a huge void in my life.But it shouldn't be like this! I have to learn how to enjoy life without women! They will come and go, I know this all too well, but why does being a single man stop me from enjoying my life? This question has been four years in the making and I really need to solve it soon or else I fear that one day when I'm older, married and happy, something will happen that will change all that and it will be too much for me to handle! Please help me! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2011): I completely understand. Your definetely not alone. Im 26 years old and ive only been in 3 relationships my entire life. Unsuccessful ones might I add. And for those few years that I was in a relationship those were my happiest times. I dont understand it myself im only trully happy when im in a relationship with a woman. I absolutely hate being single..but what helped me to sort fight this depression of being alone was starting up martial arts. I started studying taekwondo, hapkido, and jujitsu when I was 24 and for the past 2 years the feelings of loneliness and depression have declined, however im never trully happy and full of joy. But martial arts training has helped to cope. So my advice to you would be take up a hobby and commit to it. That way you wont think about it as much. But nothing is wrong you, you like me and alot of people in the world just have a feeling of being complete only when we are in relationships and in love. Hope this helps
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2011): i am the same.I feel lost and lonely when i am not with someone. i feel as tho i should be looking for someone when im single. At the moment im combined with the horrible feeling of having my heart broken by a guy i truly loved, and the feeling of pure lonliness because i am so scared to not have someone to share my time with.Im not sure if its normal, but your definately not alone
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2011): I think the answer is actually very simple, you fear abandonment for some reason.
We all do to some degree or another.
Once you realise there is absoultely nothing you can do other than pray that God will keep those that you love close and healthy and well. Then you can get on with your life and really enjoy it, including your future happy marriage! I'm sure all will be well and hope nothing will happen to change that!
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A
female
reader, Purple spotted lizard +, writes (5 March 2011):
Im not to good with boy quistions. What I see is someone who thinks they need to impress. Someone how thinks there life meaning is to make someone feel loved. Relax and take things slow. Try talking to mates more and family more to improve your social circle. It not the end of the world if you cant find someone to love over yet, it all takes time. Dont act to needy to women, they dont like that. They like someone to be there for them. If something does happen later like a affair by her, then its because she didnt care for you anymore, not anything youve done, just here stupidity that lead you to false hope. You just need to be faithfull and always there when she needs you most and then thats your share done, what happens next is her doing.
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